Would you turn down St Pauls boys school for Highgate?

[midlevel]

My son has been lucky enough to be offered places at St Paul's 13+ and Highgate 11+ and City. We are in Hampstead so Highgate is definitely much closer for him. He is naturally bright but not super work hard clever and I know he will not put the same hours in as some of the other boys at St Pauls, He is also very sporty.
I was wondering do people turn St Pauls down for Highgate? Do they even turn it down for City?
kind regards

[Devilishpyjamas]

It doesn't matter what other people do. Choose the best school for your son/family.

[AnotherNewt]

Yes, people do turn down 'prestigious' schools because they believe a different one would be a better fit for their DC.

It's a balancing act of academic reputation v wider well-being. But the top sets of all London day schools will turn out pupils with strings of A*/As. Only you can decide in which environment your DS will thrive. Which is a bit of a non-answer, I know. But as the teen years can be difficult enough anyhow, finding the school that you and he feel confident in really does matter.

What are the relative journeys like? Not just distance, but convenience/reliability? Also, which one does your DS 'see' himself in?

[AppleSetsSail]

Having been through all this a couple of years ago (and nearing my second pass at it) I am left with the impression that St. Paul's is the most alpha environment of all of the top London day schools.

I know people who have turned down St. Paul's for Kings, not sure about Highgate or City but whether this is the 'done' thing is probably not the point.

What has your son's head advised?

[midlevel]

Its not really about what is the done thing its more that I don't want him regretting it as you get one chance to go to a school like St Pauls.
Saying that though I think he will be fine at both, but i think Highgate or city would probably be a better fit.
Highgate would be by far the closest and easiest commute.

I don't have any experience about Highgate really ( I'm not from London)
Is it academic for boys ( as well as the girls) or is it just the girls who are the top of the year? Will he be stretched and stimulated as much in Highgate as he would at St Pauls? Or is Highgate too much in a bubble of Highgate? Sorry for the questions!
kind regards

[mary21]

Hampstead to Barnes must be a horrible journey. Have you route planned it?

[midlevel]

there's a school coach but its far no way round that !

[AppleSetsSail]

I just googled the journey; it will probably be 45-50 min both ways. There's no way I'd consider that unless there was a flexi-board option.

My son's head told me that we shouldn't even consider St. Paul's because it's way too competitive an environment for my son who is smart, but a bit eccentric and not particularly a 'joiner'. Is your son competitive? Again, what does your son's head say?

I truly appreciate your conundrum, I wouldn't turn down a top school in favour of a top-ish one lightly.

[AppleSetsSail]

I do Chiswick to Barnes every day (school run) and it's difficult... and that's spitting distance.

Ugh. I imagine you must have to negotiate the Hammersmith bridge?

[cakeisalwaystheanswer]

DS took Kings over St Pauls and so did lots of his friends, but then he knows other boys who took St Pauls over Kings. Most go with the easiest journey.

[KingscoteStaff]

If you did take SPS, where would your DS go for Years 7 and 8?

[Oyster2]

Absolutely. Highgate is a fantastic school. My two dcs went there and I can recommend it without reservation. If it's local as well then I think it's a no-brained tbh.

[midlevel]

I wonder if St Pauls has a Hampstead pool of boys who go there or if most choose Highgate and/or UCS?
Both Highgate and St Pauls were recommended by the Head as they are academic and sporty like him. obviously one is much much closer but would he be more stimulated and less localized at St Pauls or too pressured??
Who would have thought this would have taken as much as my thought time as the actual exam process!

[AppleSetsSail]

Would you consider moving?

I wouldn't subject my kids to this sort of commute. I'd worry about how they would cope with the GCSEs and A-Levels with this added layer of stress.

That said, my husband took the bus from Knightsbridge to Cobham for a few years and in fact loved the ride, socialised & did school work. Notably, he does not get car sick and can read articles on his phone for hours when we're driving . We have had quite a few disagreements about the outside limits of acceptable school commutes over the years.

[Needmoresleep]

Local friends matter.

Is he involved in things like drama or sport? Think about a week's play rehersals and performances all going on till late in the evening. It is much easier to me involved if you are closer. Plus much easier for the parental taxi.

[MissGintyMarlow]

i had a friend who went to St Paul's from north London and hated the commute, wished his parents had sent him somewhere closer. That said, it should very much be based around what feels right for your ds. And I imagine he'd do a commute on the tube, which is long but cuts out a lot of the traffic variables.

[midlevel]

It seems reading on these threads that locality does seem to be an over riding factor in decision making.
I think Highgate is seen as an academic school and a very good school though, so not poles away from St P.
He has done very well and its a shame he does not have any real favourite and has left the choice to us which makes it worse in a way!

[4whatthatsworth]

Midlevel. Hi and well done to your son on his offers! Either school will enable him to get top results. In my dcs class (similar ish school to Highgate) there is a boy who turned down SPS and a girl who turned down SPGS because they wanted co-ed. Neither are in the top maths stream or feel like they are coasting in any subjects. If your DS does not have a strong preference, go with the easier commute. Good luck!

[Zaggybuns]

Hi Midlevel, I am in the same situation at the moment and intrigued to learn which way your decision went in the end ....it is quite a difficult decision ...

[Mumfortheroad]

Zaggybuns - interested to know what happened, did you just get offered a place from the waiting list at St Paul’s? Didn’t realise places got offered out this late in proceedings

[Zaggybuns]

Mumfortheroad my son has been offered a place on the Main List for 2021 entry at Highgate and SPS but we have the same dilemma - Highgate or St Pauls....there is about a 15 minute difference in commute, Highgate being closer.

[Mumfortheroad]

Oh right, so I take it 13 plus? When do you need to let them know by? Does your son have a preference?