How important is the secondary school you go to?(15 Posts)
Not sure if we are doing the right thing here.
We are thinking of moving to be nearer DHs parents, to a beautiful part of the country. Only thing is the secondary schools are all not very good.
We're we live now, we are in catchment for an excellent secondary school-so much so, people from all over the county try to get their kids in. And we are 200 meters from it.
My eldest would be a out to start secondary school when we are thinking of moving.
So, would you stay in an area for a really good school? How much does it matter in the long run do you think?
So, would you stay in an area for a really good school?
Yes, is the obvious answer but how do you visualise your soon to be tween/teen benefiting from moving to a beautiful part of the country? Riding, scouts, water sports, Duke of Edinburgh Award for example - or hanging about the village green looking bored? Can you support your dcs' education at home or pay for extra tuition if necessary?
Being happy at a good school matters. You can be at the best school in the country but if you personally feel out of place it can be disastrous - obviously.
If you have good reason to believe your child would thrive at your local school you would be mad to leave unless the rest of your life is turmoil and misery and can only be improved by moving elsewhere.
One word of warning - children are disinclined to be forgiving, even into adulthood, if they believe you have wilfully messed up what should have been a decent education for insufficiently pressing reasons.
Have you discussed a move with your kids? Are they up for being nearer grandparents? Personally I would put my kids before my in-laws and parents. And on paper on would choose an excellent secondary school over living near my in laws, but we don't know the rest of what your life is like. IMHO yes a secondary school is very important.
If being in a beautiful part of the country means that you will be more rural, I would seriously consider whether you are prepared to spend their teen years as a taxi service. And, to be very brutal, the grandparents won't be around for ever so you should want to move there regardless or in other words, what is there for you apart from the in-laws
And yes secondary school is incredibly important for outcomes. Compare results and destinations of pupils at both schools as a starter. There's all sorts of research and data on the subject.
I think I'd have to stay. This happened to someone I know extremely well. a place at a fabulous selective school was given up to move nearer family. The new school did not enable the child to reach his potential. He has still been very successful in his career but he didn't get expected a levels or university so he has certainly had to do it the very very hard way.
I'd look closely at the actual statistics of the schools involved, which can be found on this website: www.education.gov.uk/schools/performance/ although you will have to go a few pages in to get the detailed figures which give you the average grades achieved by high, middle and low performing students. You may find that the overall results of your high performing secondary just reflect the fact that it has more higher achieving students in the first place.
If the figures reveal a big gap in attainment even allowing for this I would think very seriously about moving unless there are compelling reasons to do so.
I would stay with the good school. You can send the children to grandparents for holiday.
The school would take priority for me without question.
I wasn't clear there was I - what I meant is that I would stay where you are and send your DC to the good school. DC have lots of holidays to visit family without giving up the chance of a wonderful 2ndary education.
I'm torn on this really. I was very happy at school, took part in lots of sports and music activities and was relatively academic. But, it was a low performing state secondary so I was never pushed or challenged. Basically, left to my own devices as (quite rightly) there were a lot of kids who needed the help.
My parents were very laid back so I never got pushed in either place.
So I don't think I achieved as much as I could have, and I do regret that. But life's full of surprises - maybe I'll go to uni when all the kids are at school or something! I have a management job in an interesting sector, but I'm not a doctor which I secretly always wanted!
My DH on the other hand, went to a grammar, was pushed, had professional folk pushing from home - and therefore under-achieving wasn't really an option. He is now in a very interesting, fulfilling (although he has a lot of responsibility and it's stressful) and well paid career.
So it depends on a lot of factors, but it's worth consideration.
I'd put school first. Also, after school it is a big advantage to be able to live at home for a while when you are starting your first job, etc. There may not be much opportunity for starting a life as a young person out in this beautiful part of the country.
Another option is to move there, and have your children board at a great school. Obviously that's not for everyone.
Usually good school catchment = inflated house prices so moving could benefit you financially, and you could spend the balance on the great boarding school. Depending on your circumstances of course.
My first choice would be to not sacrifice my children's schooling, though.
A bit more information would be needed re the are you are moving too and what your life would be like for the children as pp said, lots of enriching outdoor pursuits or bored at the bus stop.
If its just pretty to look at and you'd get a nicer house, then I'd hold off.
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