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Fostering organisation in a Y7 child

(15 Posts)
Contraryish Thu 05-Nov-15 10:34:29

My son started secondary this September. We are in a pretty rural location, so he has to walk a few minutes to the bus stop (where he is the only one picked up) before sitting for the best part of an hour in the bus which takes him round the villages to school. The procedure is reversed in the evening and he is one of the last to get off.

So far this term he has lost his PE kit, his swimming kit, his phone, his tie and his umbrella and got two detentions for forgetting homework (fortunately we have been able to retrieve most, but not all of it). He's a bright boy, but would forget his head if it wasn't screwed on. I've told him we can't replace everything, as that will not encourage him to look after things.

Is this typical behaviour? How can I encourage him to take better care of things? I've tried suggesting he writes everything down but he forgets. I've told him to take photos but they are not allowed to use phones at school. Is it just a question of time and nagging?

yeOldeTrout Thu 05-Nov-15 10:39:40

Is he losing stuff on the bus? Does everything have his name on it?

PittacusLore Thu 05-Nov-15 10:41:44

I cant add anything constructive I'm afraid. I'm dreading this with my son when he starts secondary next year as he forgets everything too. He went back into school 4 times yesterday and still came home without his bag and jumper.

As your son has a phone could you put a checklist on it for him to look at before he leaves school? Though this would only work if he remembers his phone in the first place.

Contraryish Thu 05-Nov-15 10:49:32

Some things have been left on the bus, some at the bus stop, some at school, some he doesn't know!

Things are pretty much all named, although his PE kit (the most expensive bit) only has his initials on the outside, as recommended by the uniform shop. Though he is one of two children in his year with the same initials and the other is a girl who is a lot smaller than him, the school have now said initials are not sufficient to be able to repatriate lost property!

NewLife4Me Thu 05-Nov-15 10:53:47

I have a dd similar to this, I don't have the answers but watching with interest.
There is one thing I am finding is helping and it's nothing new, but the usual praise for what they do remember and of course when you organise important things for them they get a bit shirty as they can do it themselves apparently grin

Brioche201 Thu 05-Nov-15 11:08:14

Sadly very normal for y7 parents to be on first name terms with staff in rbe bus company's office! They have so much to think about. I know it's difficult bit try to be understanding in these early does get better!

NewLife4Me Thu 05-Nov-15 12:29:53

I have just been in dds room to get it ready for a guest and I'm having to completely gut it.
She had one friend over during half term, that's it and yet the place is trashed.
In return she is spending her one day off this week helping me catch up with the spare room which is what I was supposed to be doing instead.
I can understand they aren't perfect at this age, but they need to start learning how to manage their things and the consequences if they don't.
My dd struggles to locate washing baskets both at school and home, she must stink.

Icouldbeknitting Thu 05-Nov-15 12:34:21

As the survivor of a Y7 dreamer the only thing I can say is that it will get better as he gets into the routine of school life. If he's carrying multiple bags could you consolidate into a single huge one so there is only one thing to keep track of? I'm surprised that he lost his phone, everything else yes, but their phones are usually welded to them.

Contraryish Thu 05-Nov-15 14:02:07

Well, he didn't really lose his phone. He had a 'retro' Nokia we gave him when his old one started going wrong, it was so small he hadn't realised it was still in his pocket!

OK, I guess patience is the order of the day ...

I'm conscious that he's already carrying a reasonably sized rucksack for a few minutes walk every day, and he's only little. I think any bigger bag and he'd topple over!

Thanks all for the support and sympathy!

mychildrenarebarmy Thu 05-Nov-15 14:09:06

A friend of mine told her son that she was going to put aside £20 per term to replace anything he lost. If the losses reached more then the extra would come out of his pocket money, if there was any left then he would get to keep it. He ended up giving her £35 the first term but since then hasn't lost a thing.

Contraryish Thu 05-Nov-15 14:35:39

mychildren that's not a bad idea!

TeenAndTween Thu 05-Nov-15 14:47:07

only has his initials on the outside as recommended by the uniform shop

I would think they meant put the initials on the outside in addition to proper naming with nametapes on the inside. Initials helps on the ball staff notice someone is wearing incorrect kit. It won't help lost kit find it's owner much.

All bags to be 'tied' to rucksack so can't be left behind?
Use a locker at school and don't take so much back and forth?

Contraryish Thu 05-Nov-15 14:50:08

TeenAndTween - I know that now, hindsight and all that!

He has a locker at school too, I'm amazed he hasn't lost the key yet! smile

NewLife4Me Thu 05-Nov-15 14:55:50


for goodness sake, don't tempt fate. grin
It is strange how the important stuff to them doesn't get lost or forgotten/ left at home.
My dd hasn't forgotten her tuck once yet, but other important stuff has been left here grin

bobthebuddha Tue 10-Nov-15 13:16:41

I could do with some ideas too, although the £20 set aside is a good one. On that basis DS owes me about £80 by now. After spending over £70 on new uniform ready for September DS insisted he carry the bag then lost it that same day! We've had lost PE kit and various detentions for forgotten homework too; he's so chaotic it drives me scatty.

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