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The ubiquitous 'could do better' ' child....when will he ever put the effort in??

(7 Posts)
ggirl Wed 30-Sep-15 08:20:16

Ds is in yr8 .
He is capable of quite good work but frankly puts in the minimum effort ,especially in written work.

He is still writing with no regard for capital letters ,sloppy spelling and rambling sentences that make no sense.

He will correct his work when I stand over him but frankly at age 13 should I have to!?

Any ideas to help ? ...or just more gin?

AalyaSecura Wed 30-Sep-15 11:45:54

I've seen an approach in a book called 'happier easier homework' or something like that, which seems like it could help get a good balance between the extremes of micromanaging versus leaving them completely on their own.

There were 3 steps recommended:
1. Ask them questions at the start to help them set their goals and plan for the homework - what needs to be done, how are you going to approach it, what info do you need, where will you find this, how long should it take, what would be good in the teachers eyes, what common mistakes do you need to keep an eye out for (so maybe spellings, punctuation) - not all of these questions obv! Just relevant ones.
2. They crack on with it on heir own, you don't get involved (and if you are getting drawn in, then it shows what kind of questions they need to be asked up front).
3. When they've finished, you both look at it, both find 3 things that are good, and both find 2 things that could be better. This is easier to do because of the thinking that's gone on in step 1.

I think over time, the idea is that the thinking it through up front and evaluating it at the end becomes a habit, so something they do by themselves. I have slightly younger dc, though, so have no idea how this would land with a yr8!

ggirl Wed 30-Sep-15 15:56:37

oh that's a really helpful approach , thank you for posting that ,I will have a go.

littledrummergirl Thu 01-Oct-15 07:10:10

Ds1 used to be like this. Having tried and failed to convince him he needed to work for the end of year exams I told him in yr 9 to do it his way. He did really badly, was dropped a set in one subject and spent the next yr turning it around. He has one A under his belt and is now on course to meet his target of A/A* grades.

He needed to realise it for himself.

sandgrown Thu 01-Oct-15 07:30:11

Boys tend not to knuckle down until about age 13. My DS is just like yours but now he has chosen his options he is working much harder. His writing is still atrocious and will have to improve but in the future I suppose much of it will be done on computer.

ggirl Thu 01-Oct-15 08:07:28

so he might be about to change !! there is hope!

PassiveAgressiveQueen Thu 01-Oct-15 08:13:38

I git a third, bother could have done better.
So never is my experience

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