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AIBU to be pissed off at ds's sports day allocation?

(145 Posts)
basildonbond Fri 10-Jul-15 18:55:34

Ds is in Y10 he has ASD, dyspraxia and low muscle tone. He is 6'3" with a 24" waist and his arms and legs look like twiglets - he has an air of fragility as if a gust of wind could carry him away.

His school has sports day next week and the children are allocated an event - they can't choose. Ds has been put down for the shot put. Yes, really ...

Dh thinks someone in the PE department is deliberately taking the piss and wants me to go in all guns blazing. I have no intention of letting ds be utterly humiliated so am going to keep him off school on Monday. WWYD?

FenellaFellorick Fri 10-Jul-15 18:57:29

I'd ask them how come he was put down for that and see what they said.

PotteringAlong Fri 10-Jul-15 18:57:46

Has he done the shot put at school? Maybe he was actually good at it and they're giving him a chance to succeed.

Sparklingbrook Fri 10-Jul-15 18:58:57

Mmm. Seems a bit odd. Did they ask your DS what he would like to do or was it all random?

I don't blame you for keeping him off, no need to put him through that. All guns blazing though? Probably not but I would be tempted to explain why he wasn't going in.

Wittynewnameifonly Fri 10-Jul-15 18:59:40

Unless he wants to do it I'd call him in sick. The potential humiliation is not worth it.

Sports day is the only day I have called my child in sick when I know they are not.

DS1 was 'sick' in yr7 then I made him go in yr8 on the promise that if it was as and as he imagined I would call him in sick every subsequent year. It was as bad as he imagined as he got allocated the triple jump and didn't even make the sand one time. Yr9 now and I wouldn't hesitate in calling him in sick, if humiliation is the likely outcome.

00100001 Fri 10-Jul-15 19:01:21

Why would they just randomly allicqye sports?? confused

Wittynewnameifonly Fri 10-Jul-15 19:11:38

No idea why you would randomly allicqye sports grin.

In DS's school a class rep allocates everyone events, so their friends of course get the better ones...

Sparklingbrook Fri 10-Jul-15 19:19:47

Just asked DS2 and he says they get to choose themselves what they want to do. He did football and handball.

ReallyTired Fri 10-Jul-15 19:20:22

Honestly, I don't think your son should get out of something just because he is no good at it. Would you let him skip school to avoid a french test or anything else he doesn't like?

My son has severe flat feet and got allotted the 1500 metre race. He came last, but did not die.

basildonbond Fri 10-Jul-15 19:20:50

Ds is crap at all sports other than long distance running but the longest race at sports day is 800m

He's never even picked up a shot put so I very much doubt he's shown any previously undetected aptitude for it hmm

I also don't think it's random - ds says they got told which event they were going to do and the other boy doing shot put is similarly sportingly challenged (and I suspect from having met him several times that he's on the NT/spectrum border)

We have had 'issues' with the PE dept - his teacher phoned me in Y7 to complain that he was taking too long to get changed and that his motor skills were very poor - well durr, tell me something I don't know ..,

insanityscatching Fri 10-Jul-15 19:38:38

It seems a daft idea for the dc not to compete at what they are good at hmm
Dd is also really slow at getting dressed (autism and the usual mix of extras). I told the school before she started she would need extra time to change but the TA helpfully wrote asking if I would get her to practise at home hmm I helpfully wrote back that dd had been practising for the last eight years. I mentioned all the ways I had adapted her uniform to help her from changing buttons, adding velcro, colour coding etc.I then listed all her difficulties and the strategies written in her statement. I then told them that they needed to make reasonable adjustments and so they could allow her to go to school in her PE kit and do away with the need to change, they could alter the uniform to one which was more conducive to dd's needs or they could give her the extra time to change as had been agreed before she started the school wink I've never heard another word and dd gets the extra time as routine and even longer when she has new trousers/shoes etc.

LashesandLipstick Fri 10-Jul-15 19:41:14

Call in sick. I was the awkward sports kid at school, same conditions as your son, and sports day was just a day for humiliation. Do something nice with him instead

I'd also complain afterwards, it's ridiculous that they'd do that.

FadedRed Fri 10-Jul-15 19:41:14

Tell him to 'accidently' drop it on the PE teachers foot. grin I'd book him for an optician/dentist/anything appointment and have a nice day in town/anywhere but school.

Theas18 Fri 10-Jul-15 19:42:06

They probably struggled with allocation. I assume he can't run well? At least shot put is a skill / technique thing not pure strength. Shots also come in different weights.

LashesandLipstick Fri 10-Jul-15 19:43:15

ReallyTired no but you don't do a French test in front of an audience with prizes for the best and mocking those who come last.

Wittynewnameifonly Fri 10-Jul-15 19:48:14

Exactly lashes

youarekiddingme Fri 10-Jul-15 19:53:22

My ds 'helped' organise at his yr 6 sports day today. Having ASD he was like a pig in shit grin

I don't think it's fair at all to introduce a competitive event for any pupil when they've not had previous experience of it. It does smack of the 'extra event' for those who've not made the grade to compete elsewhere.
It's hard enough when you never disabilities without adding barriers.

I'd keep him home.

Clavinova Fri 10-Jul-15 20:14:20

Field events are usually tucked away in a corner - hardly anyone will be watching and throwing a shot put is over in seconds; your ds can be involved without humiliation. Coming last in a track event with the whole school watching is far worse imo.

00100001 Fri 10-Jul-15 20:28:58

Just get him to throw the shot.... why not be part of the team? His points for entering the event will help tot he overall score.

He's not going to be humiliated. He;ll spend most of the time sitting around anyway.

00100001 Fri 10-Jul-15 20:31:22

" Coming last in a track event with the whole school watching is far worse imo." depends on the school!

Our school the last person got the biggest cheers! it was a great example of perseverance and sportsman ship for the runner (what, we shouldn't try if we're not going to win? maybe your own 'win' is making it round the 1500m?) and team work and support for the others. Kids were running along sisde the last runner encouraging the all the way "you can make it! come on! not far now!" etc etc etc smile

00100001 Fri 10-Jul-15 20:32:23

the one kid was elated when he finished his 800m with the encouragement of pretty much the whole school <proud teacher moment>

Sparklingbrook Fri 10-Jul-15 20:38:11

I think just keep him off, unless you can get the PE teacher to see sense.

Aquilla Fri 10-Jul-15 20:40:49

What on earth is all this talk of sports allocation? I've never heard of this but I'm foreign. How silly to not be able to choose for your strengths (or lack of!). In my day all the rubbish PE people like me chose three 'easy ' events which was widely agreed to be shot put, discus and javelin.
I really do despair of PE in state schools here...hmm

Clavinova Fri 10-Jul-15 20:58:46

Of course the last person in a race always gets the biggest cheer but the op is worried about her ds being humiliated - in that case she wouldn't want him to be the last child in a track event.
Honestly though - who bothers to watch the shot put unless their own child is in the event? I will happily watch other peoples' children running round a track and jumping over hurdles etc; at least there's some excitement in that - but shot put, on the far side of the field - the op is worrying about nothing.

Sparklingbrook Fri 10-Jul-15 21:03:36

When DS2 was at first school when he was in a sports day race as soon as the winner passed the line he just stopped and walked back to his seat. grin

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