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To move your children to a new school or not??

(8 Posts)
fessmess Tue 18-Nov-14 17:27:47

Lovely wise women of mn, I'm looking for people's experiences and views on moving children to a new Secondary School. Their current one has an RI Ofsted, like all of the 5 school's in this area, but is slowly improving(as are all the others.) Our problems with current school are that it's very Draconian (ie Internal Exclusions and Detentions for not having your "learning kit", which may mean a ruler or book.) My dd2 is in Year 7 and has not yet settled, still feeling very anxious to the point of giving herself severe indigestion, missing school because of this and having meds. My dd1 is in Year 10 and has been recently bullied; food being thrown, name calling and bullied via fb.

My questions are, how much of this is true of all Secondary schools? And secondly what is your opinion on the impact moving school may have on their progress, vs leaving them at a school where neither of them are happy.

Thanks in advance!

fessmess Tue 18-Nov-14 17:37:08


WhereTheWildlingsAre Tue 18-Nov-14 17:53:02

My advice is to go round other secondaries and have a look at them, see how they feel to you.

Not all schools are the same and if your year 7 carries on feeling anxious then she will not be able to learn. So horrible for her to feel like that. Have you tried talking to the school about her worries?

TeenAndTween Wed 19-Nov-14 13:25:05

Bullying happens in all schools, it is how the school deals with it that varies. If your y10 has been OK up to now I'd aim to stay there. Options choices and exam boards may vary elsewhere.

Your y7 is different though. School is not worth making yourself ill for, this seems quite extreme. Maybe talk with the school whilst simultaneously quietly looking around elsewhere in case it doesn't resolve and you can find a school with a better match.

Itscoldouthere Wed 19-Nov-14 19:36:40

Both of my DS's moved secondary school, one in yr 9 one in yr 8 (at different times not both together).

They are much happier, why keep them somewhere that isn't working or making them unhappy if you have other options that feel like they would be better for your DCs.

MillyMollyMama Wed 19-Nov-14 20:11:06

If all the schools are RI, will the ethos be different in any of them? They will all want their pupils to have the required equipment and be ready to learn. I would not move in year 10 as the exam boards will be a problem. Definitely see what the school are doing about the behaviour issues. Seems odd they are draconian on equipment but put up with pupils throwing food!

temporarilyjerry Wed 19-Nov-14 20:40:13

How do your DC feel about moving? My DSs go to a RI school. DD goes to an outstanding school. I'd like to move DS2 (DS1 is in 6th form) but he doesn't want to move. Sorry, I can't give you any advice; I don't know what to do myself.

chococupcakes Sun 23-Nov-14 12:31:25

My DD was in a school which she eventually began to hate so much it started making her ill. Migraines, stomach aches the works. The children were not interested in learning at all. From top of the class her grades began to fall.

Admittedly we went private in the end and to be honest, had no choice because all the good local ones were full anyway with massive waiting lists. The change has absolutely changed our lives. Settled in new school from day one. On a Sunday afternoon and holidays is actually excited about going back.

Indeed, there will be the issue for the elder one with regard to the examining boards. I'm afraid I don't know enough on that topic to advise.

I will say this however, if your child is so unhappy it's making them ill, move them!

Good luck.

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