What should be happening?(6 Posts)
Dd is new to year seven, she has autism and a statement of SEN. She has two close friends and is making tentative connections with others from her class. The autism makes it difficult for her but academically she is bright.
In Primary a girl C had phases where she would harass, intimidate dd and her two friends. Primarily I thought, because she wanted to be one of the group of three but she never wanted to join all three she wanted to pick off one of the three and ostracise them.
C now has boyfriend R who has no self restraint or boundaries seemingly (was the same in Primary) and now C uses R to threaten dd and her friends and today he has hit one of dd's friends after C egged him on.
I have been emailing and telephoning SENCo for more than three weeks down to pretty much daily incidences of harrassment and intimidation and threats and the only solution proffered is that dd hides herself away in Learning Support so as to avoid C and R.
To my mind this is wholly unacceptable seeing as dd is never in Learning Support for lessons as she is top group and so has no connection with the place and as far as I can see it supports and condones what C and R are doing.
So in a secondary school what should be happening to address the issue and is placing the victim in Learning Support considered acceptable and a solution? What more can I do to urge the school to address this matter?
ask to see their bullying policy and then ask why they aren't following it
Forward the emails that you've sent to the SENCo (and his/her replies) to your dd's Form Tutor and the Head of Year.The SENCo is failing to deal with the matter.
Well today I should be speaking to the Head of Year and so will ask for the anti bullying policy. I spoke to the SENCo again last night (who really doesn't like the fact that I follow up phone calls with emails) and CCTV footage is to be checked to see if they can see R assaulting dd's friend Why on earth dd and her friends' report isn't sufficient evidence I don't know particularly when they have documented incidences where R has threatened to assault them spanning three weeks. I document by email because the SENCo denies what has been said even when I forward the emails that she has sent quoting exactly that and I have forwarded emails to Head of Year and HT pointing out that the solution suggested supports and condones the bullying and ostracises the victim.
I am going to put it all on a more formal footing I think quoting the anti bullying policy and demanding answers and copying it all into the whole leadership team.
There may be a particular member of the leadership team who has responsibility for overseeing the behaviour and anti-bullying policies. (There is at my dd's school.) It might be more useful to find out who that person is and target her, rather than just emailing everyone.
Well have finally spoken to Head of Year and apparently it is he who should be addressing the bullying situation although he wouldn't be drawn on why he hasn't been addressing it previously even though he has had my emails and I have seen the emails from the SENCo referring it to him too.
He believes he has made progress this morning so we will wait and see.
He's not terribly happy about my email follow ups because he "believes parents and staff should be working together" although I did reassure him that I am more than happy to work with the school to support dd and see documenting conversations as a way of supporting this so that we can all be clear that any proposed actions are carried out and results considered
I have asked for the school's anti bullying policy and for him to document where we are up to so far. I don't think I've made a friend today but at least he knows I won't be fobbed off and I made it very clear how I felt about inclusion and proposing that dd be hidden away in Learning Support was more exclusion in my mind.
I don't expect it all to end today as C has proved to be very tenacious over the years and R will just exacerbate this but at least today I feel far less helpless than I did .
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