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Why is it so hard......

(24 Posts)
poppydoppy Sun 26-May-13 17:13:16

To get boys to revise? eldest son has an entrance test in a few weeks and so far only done two papers!!! I feel like its a battle every day and now younger DS is doing the same Aaaahhh

When I was 10 I was out having fun in the holidays not stuck in revising for test after test.

How much revision are your children doing each day for end of year exams?

Chottie Sun 26-May-13 17:18:06

I could never get my son to revise for any exam..... I think it was just the way he was wired. But it worked out ok and he is an independent adult now. I hope this gives you some hope. I really used to despair of him at times......

BackforGood Sun 26-May-13 17:23:53

ds did start once he got into the 6th form.

HTH wink

poppydoppy Sun 26-May-13 17:34:43

If he doesn't revise he wont pass the entrance test.

It is so time consuming. I have been giving him past papers and then going over the things hes not so sure on but there is soooo much to get through and with two of them its a nightmare. How on earth do others do it?

mummytime Sun 26-May-13 17:51:21

What is your plan B?

Because you can't make some one study.
You can make them sit down in front of books, or carry out some revision exercise, or do a past paper.
But you can't make them learn.
You also will spend a lot of time and energy just trying to make them go through the motions.
The consequences may be that they stop trying altogether, or leave home ASAP or....

lljkk Sun 26-May-13 18:10:49

I honestly have no idea when DS has exams.
(trouble does neither does he, lol)

Bowlersarm Sun 26-May-13 18:13:39

That is encouraging chottie. My ds has gcse's next year but despite nagging, bribing, shouting, encouraging he just won't do any work outside of school sad

poppydoppy Sun 26-May-13 18:42:29

I'm glad I'm not alone.

mumslife Sun 26-May-13 21:14:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

longingforsomesleep Mon 27-May-13 10:19:15

At 10 years old I'd be aiming for 10-20 minute chunks at a time and would get them to do sections of past papers rather than attempt whole ones in one go.

But, coming out of the other end of the school system and the mum of boys I now know that you can't make them work if they don't want to. I have one very bright boy who has just left grammar school aged 18 and is on track for some miserable results in the summer. I also have a 16 year old boy who is in the middle of GCSEs. The 18 year old tells me he revises but I've not seen much evidence of this. The 16 year old has to have his books forcibly removed from him when the rest of us are going to bed. He's working incredibly hard - too hard in my view! The difference between them is one is self-motivated, the other isn't. It's nothing to do with me. The one who works does so because he wants to achieve, not because I make him. And nothing I've said to the 18 year old over the past 5 or 6 years has made one jot of difference.

Chottie Mon 27-May-13 12:22:35

Bowlersarm what changed for my son was finding something he was interested in and really, really wanted to do. He put his social life on hold, passed all exams first time with an overall grade of 95.5%. He got a job in his chosen field, has been promoted and passes all 6 monthly check exams with above average marks.

It was just finding that spark to light his interest. I hope things work out for your son too.

wordfactory Tue 28-May-13 08:16:56

What I have noticed with my mixed gender twins (perfect scientific sample) is that my DD revises in a very conspicuous way, with lots of flash cards, post it notes, 'please test me mum'.

DS looks as if nowt much is happening.

And yet...clearly it is going in because he does very well.

Could this be the case, op?

poppydoppy Tue 28-May-13 09:27:40

Wordfactory. My DDs the same, I've only seen her at meal times because shes been up in her room revising. Girls are so much easier.

My eldest son is a problem he doesn't want to do anything, he uses every excuse in the book not to revise and even when he is revising "the lights are on but no ones home" IYKWIM.

I want to pull my hair out.

seeker Tue 28-May-13 09:31:05

"Wordfactory. My DDs the same, I've only seen her at meal times because shes been up in her room revising. Girls are so much easier."

Did you say she was 10? Why on earth does she need to spend all day every day revising?

poppydoppy Tue 28-May-13 09:44:41

My youngest is 10. DD is older.

seeker Tue 28-May-13 09:48:11

Doing GCSEs?

wordfactory Tue 28-May-13 10:01:12

Mine is year 9...but she has always revised conspicuously. She likes an audience! I can only dream that one day she will sequestrate herself to her room (where there is a perfectly nice desk).

DS just slouches about the place, vaguely glancing at a dog eared scap of paper. Yesterday he swore he was revising while bouncing on the trampoline [hmmm]

seeker Tue 28-May-13 10:06:40

Mine revise privately, but need an audience for practising instruments. They follow me round like a bloody marching band.........

Abra1d Tue 28-May-13 10:11:25

My daughter is the same--also Year 9--gel pens, cards, Post-its, huge, bulky folders on every surface. Oscillates between saying it doesn't really matter because these are only Year 9 exams, and saying that it's really important that she does well. Lots of loud sighing.

Son, doing GCSES, is much less conspicuously anxious. Has been heard muttering that he can wait until he's on the school bus to learn something for an exam that morning. Not always sure of the daily timetable for exams. Seems to work fairly hard, though.

webwiz Tue 28-May-13 11:19:58

I would agree with the conspicuous revision - DD2 has always liked an audience so that we can all see her beautiful executed mind maps. She's at university now and because her exams are twice a year she needs to revise in the Christmas and Easter holidays and still likes to take over the kitchen and with her piles of colour coordinated notebooks.

DS is a bit all or nothing (he's doing GCSEs) he either does hours and hours or messes about and does virtually nothing. Its all notetaking and past papers though without a gel pen in sight! He wants to do well and seems to be getting enough done without any nagging from me.

DD1 did the least revision of the three for GCSEs and not much more for A levels. Its a wonder she ever got to university but has worked hard since she got there. She seems to have lost the "how little can I get away with" attitude as she's got older, thank goodness.

Abra1d Tue 28-May-13 12:55:04

Does anyone else have the loud, theatrical sighings from daughters? The declarations of doom?

seeker Tue 28-May-13 12:58:15

I can remember my mother saying briskly to me "Come, come now. Don't give way to despair"

I'm amazed she survived!

wordfactory Tue 28-May-13 13:49:04

Oh yes, DD always says she will fail! DS always tells me everythings under control! I suspect the truth lies somewhere in the middle.

Abra1d Tue 28-May-13 14:15:08

Yikes, Seeker, yes, in this household there'd be an almighty explosion if I tried briskness, though I suspect sometimes it is the most helpful response (sometimes I use it on myself).

Yeah, wordfactory, it's as though they have to put you through it to reassure themselves.

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