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Starting at state nursery question

26 replies

Iggi999 · 14/05/2015 21:25

Ds is due to start a council-run nursery in September when he's three. Reading their letter, they describe a settling in process that seems to go on and on - I was expecting a settling in visit, but this talks of a gradual build-up to staying there for the full session with me available throughout - would love to know what this has meant in practice for anyone! Work might let me out for session one but I can't manage a week away (or more!) as can't take annual leave - dh is in the same boat.
Also trying to budget and wondered how much anyone else has been charged for the daily snacks etc - a small fee was mentioned, but no figure.
(Am loving that there is a Scotsnet to ask for local advice on now Star )

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weasleybreeder · 15/05/2015 06:42

In my experience the settling in period varies depending on the child and how well they are adapting. One of my DC attends a council run nursery that offers places to 2 year olds and also offers extended hours, the wee ones that age really benefit from a long, gentle introduction phase. However with the older ones using the nursery for their early years education only tend to have a short session with parent nearby or present and if they have been fine then they start the next day.

The activity fee in my council area is £2 per week regardless of sessions attended. This covers the snacks, parties, visiting specialists etc.

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Iggi999 · 15/05/2015 06:57

Brilliant, thank you. He is already at a childminders so I hope he'll adapt happily to this.
£2 a week is great - I was worrying it might be that per day, about £50 a month!

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BloodyDogHairs · 15/05/2015 10:37

I got my letter in yesterday, it didn't mention settling in sessions. It only said that on the 1st day he will only be in for a hour. I'm hoping I get more info when I accept his place.

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Groovee · 15/05/2015 18:07

I work in an edinburgh council nursery. We invite you for an hour on the the first day then gradually build up according to the child. Some need longer some need less.

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Iggi999 · 15/05/2015 18:32

Does that mean he just can't go if we are both at work? Sad I work part-time so I suppose I could keep taking him on the two days I'm not at work to settle... His childminder can't do it on the other days as it says the person should be available throughout.

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Iggi999 · 15/05/2015 18:38

Sorry I know it's best for the dcs but for me it's just another reminder that I'm not able to be there as much as other parents!

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poocatcherchampion · 15/05/2015 18:43

I'm not in Scotland - but that seems excessive to me and my dd was very clingy. I told her pre school was something she did on her own, so I didn't even stay the first settling in session. I stayed 20mins and then left her for an hour.
She got used to it fine
And she has always been cared for at home until now.

You can't be the first person who won't be able to manage that. Have you asked them?

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CycleChic · 15/05/2015 18:56

"Available throughout" just meant able to nip into nursery if the child wouldn't stop crying after the first 20 min or so at the nursery my dd went to.
Have you asked your childminder? I'm guessing that she/he will be doing drop off and/or pick up and therefore lives close enough for that, assuming they're game. You could always pay for the extra 2 hours of the cm'a time during the settling in period.

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Groovee · 15/05/2015 20:32

You would be best calling the nursery and asking.

My son was difficult with me but I got granny and dad to drop him off and there were no issues. Then his childminder he was fine with too.

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Iggi999 · 15/05/2015 22:59

Cyclechic I'm pretty sure I have to keep paying the cm throughout all year round! It probably won't be an issue, just picturing her having to cart the other mindees back to nursery. No family at all to help here.
(You'd think this was my pfb, it isn't honestly!)

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holidaysarenice · 15/05/2015 23:03

Tell them that your son will settle better with the childminder dropping off than you.
If your cm will do it that is.

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Iggi999 · 18/05/2015 18:22

Thanks, Holidays, I'm pretty sure she will but she wouldn't be able to hang around which I felt is what they're after. I'll just make sure he's happy about going, somehow!

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Iggi999 · 18/05/2015 18:24

Grovee with your experience, do you know if parents get "in trouble" if they don't send their child in for every session? (Thinking I'll feel guilty sending him in on the days I don't work, yet otoh it will be great for getting household stuff out of the way etc at times).

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Jackieharris · 18/05/2015 18:32

I had this issue too. It was a total pain and the nursery was very inflexible. Some have a real attitude about it being for 'education' not 'childcare.

But nurseries can be very different.

Call them and explain your situation. If your dp is used to going to a cm he should settle in v quickly.

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Groovee · 18/05/2015 19:09

I've personally never bothered about parents taking them out on their days off. Tends to be really old school staff who seem to frown more. But your child, your call.

The only time I wouldn't do it would be about now when they are preparing to go to school as we're doing daily trips just now to have story with P1, playtime with them etc.

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Iggi999 · 18/05/2015 19:18

Thanks, of course wouldn't do it if anything like that planned - though I suppose something is planned for every day so might seem like I was saying it wasn't important... Just trying to get a wee bit more time with him before he's at primary like his brother and loves his Xbox more than me
The sessions are in the afternoon and he won't have time for a nap before them so I can see me just wanting to keep him off for a joint kip sometimes!

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Iggi999 · 18/05/2015 19:19

Obviously by that I meant a sleep together, I'm not introducing him to drugs at 3 Blush

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prettybird · 18/05/2015 19:42

Ds' (Glasgow City Council run) nursery wasn't bothered by us taking him out. Having said that, it wasn't a regular weekly request. It was just in the very odd occasion and then for two weeks when we went to South Africa for a holiday in the November.

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CycleChic · 19/05/2015 18:47

Huh. I know that it's typical for CMs to charge for holidays to keep the place, but I thought it was an hourly rate, not a day one? The CM we have certainly doesnt charge for nurseryhours. ..

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ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 19/05/2015 18:57

I pay £3.30 a week for nursery for 5 half days. It'll be a fair amount more if in for full days as more food and half the hours won't be free. You can probably find the pricing on your councils website.

DD was pretty tough to settle. It took a long time, and the nursery called me in if they couldn't calm her down. This happened a lot in the first few weeks maybe. She started out for an hour with me on the first day, and then I would leave her for 30mins building up by 10mins day/30mins a week ish. It was very child/parent led though. Your DC is used to a childcare setting so I guess would settle much faster.

I think that if your child is inconsolable they would prefer they were taken by the parent, although in DDs nursery I'm sure they would cope.

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Groovee · 19/05/2015 19:56

Cycle I had to pay while ds was at nursery as it was the childminder who was on call for him. She couldn't fill his space for the short span he was there. All the childminders charge round here on an hourly rate and if they are in playgroup or nursery. Once they went to school I only paid for the before and after school times I used. I only paid term time so was happy to pay as there were a number of times nursery was closed due to faulty heating and she had him.

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Iggi999 · 19/05/2015 19:58

That's interesting, Itsallgoingtobefine, and I hope your lo is perfectly happy now! There's no way to predict how they'll be I suppose.
Cyclechic I really hope you're right, I've seen threads on here where posters were shot down in flames for asking if their cm fees reduce when the child is at nursery, so I've been too scared to ask mine yet!

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Iggi999 · 19/05/2015 20:00

It's about £15 a day Sad

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howabout · 19/05/2015 21:15

On settling in our nursery does it over 3 days but less if DC is OK. We have a voluntary donation of £3 per week no matter how many sessions. Mine is my last DC and so with other school siblings days are very short after nursery session. I checked and since nursery is not compulsory no problem with not using sessions so long as you let them know - same goes for if they are off sick.

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youmakemydreams · 19/05/2015 21:31

It's not aberdeen is it? Ds1 started nursery in aberdeen and omg it was a huge faff compared to dd starting in the highlands. They wanted a gradual build up too and an hour a day for weeks. In the end he was fine and only dos the hour for a week but they had mentioned 4 weeks at first!! Shock
Not sure about the snack money it is usually about £2.50 a week and on some areas a donation and in the highlands we get it free now.
I thought it was common to pay your cm for nursery hours because they couldn't fill that space of a few hours a day and they are often available as an emergency contact and they will be filling those hours again in school holidays.

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