Would you do it?

[HopeHopity]

I went on maternity leave and after that I didn't feel I wanted to go back full time and I was given a career break so I could stay home for longer.
I then realised the commute was too long and they didn't agree to part time hours. I found another job closer to home, 2 days a week.
It was going ok but DC (13 months at the time) was struggling settling in at nursery. Summer came and I was not working (I only work 2 days a week school term) and dropping DC off, then 18 months and DC crying every time.
So I called it all off.
I met my boss as I was given some time to think about it and I though maybe I could go back, so I looked into childminders instead.

I am so stuck.

I adore my DC. I love time with DC. I just love DC so much as I am sure you all do.
I am terrified of DC being sad or not safe without us around. I know I need to build trust with child minder and this will take time.

I think I just want to be a SAHP because I am terrified of DCbeing sad or hurt, I also love our time together.

But I did enjoy the job, and it is 2 days a week term time only.
It would mean maybe a better working future for us if DH was ill and my job does help me with DC because it is working with other children and I learn lots.

Help me. Would you trust and leave DC for 2 days a week term time only to go to a job that it is quite full on but you enjoy? Money-wise it does not make a big difference now, but maybe pension...?

Thank you because I am lost

I feel so lucky I have been a SAHP until now and I love it but sometimes I lose my patience and I am very isolated, with a history of anxiety and depression, DH thinks it would be good for me but supports me no matter what.

Thanks

[BackforGood]

Without a doubt I would.
You have the 'holy grail' of jobs, that I would say a huge number of parents would snap the employers hand off for.

What is your issue with your dc going to spend time wiht another caring adult for a few hours each week ?

[HopeHopity]

Thank you @BackforGood !

My issue is my DC being scared or unsafe or thinking he is not loved. I was mildly neglected as a child and I am very sensitive (too sensitive) and anxious.
He is so perfect and small 😪
Will he be scared? Frightened? Sad?
Thank you

[BackforGood]

Of course not. He will have a lovely time being loved and cared for by someone who likes being with c so much they have decided to make it their job.

My dc have very fond memories of their CMers. (dc are adult now)