Hi there. My first ever post. I'll jump right into it....I feel like I've ruined my life by having a child, admitting this to the world is just heartbreaking as despite hating being a mum, my boy (4years) means the world to me. I have been a single mum for 3 years since the relationship with his abusive father came to an end! I have struggled with suicidal thoughts, depression and anxiety from the age 11 when my parents separated! I always thought I wanted a child and that the child would give my life some meaning, give me someone to love and care for forever. My pregnancy was just perfect and I loved every minute, But since his birth I have regretted my decision to have a child nearly every day! I have never been able to admit this, even to my doctor. I am on constant anti depressants and counselling but this doesn't even come close to controlling my mood swings or how much I hate being a mum. Am I alone? Does this make me a bad parent? My current bf of 2 years wants children in the future, but I don't. How do I break that news to him? The bond his has with my boy is lush. They are two peas in a pod but I don't know if we will both lose him if I tell him I don't want anymore :( someone please tell me I'm not a shit mother or girlfriend ðŸ˜
Thanks for reading.
One stressed out mummy!
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I feel like I've ruined my life
2 replies
20LS08OJL · 02/03/2017 19:01
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