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(10 Posts)
Catpuss Fri 19-Jun-15 20:51:46


I've just found this board and would like to say hello; I don't feel like there are many people who understand being a sahp around me so this could be a great place for moral support! I've got 3 daughters aged 5 1/2, 4 and 18 months. I feel so tired all the time and am pretty useless once they are in bed even though I should totally use that time for clearing/tidying etc. Why is it that even once the crazy sleepless nights of the newborn stage are over i still don't ever feel fully charged? I rarely get full nights at the moment as my 4 year old has nightmares and often needs a cuddle once or twice a night, or even sometimes ends up with us. But even still it can't just be that. I'm sure it is also the constant crazy conversations and tying to clear up whichever cupboard the little one has emptied when I've got my back turned. Anyone else find just being with small kids all day knackering?! (Wonderful of course too, but I'm assuming you all know that or you wouldn't be here!) Oh yeah, and the eldest is in school so I have 2 at home all day.

Catpuss Fri 19-Jun-15 20:58:55

Oh great, posted it twice ��. Can you tell I'm new to this?!

FlopIsMyParentingGuru Fri 19-Jun-15 21:06:49

I don't know why but I've been the same. DS is now at school but I found I was so tired during the 18 months to 2.5 stage. I'm finding the same with DD aged 2.
That said if it's debilitating then consider a trip to GP's?
I just roll with it and take naps, it passes too soon!

Rinkydinkypink Fri 19-Jun-15 21:09:27

It's exhausting!

I found working so easier especially as my dc get older. I could get 5 minutes of mental space. I could concentrate on one thing at a time.

Firstly I find I'm 'on duty' all day every day, day and night. My attention is constantly being drawn from one thing to the next and I feel mentally alert all the time and physically it's actually quite demanding.

There is no difference between any of the days or weekends, it's relentless and never ending and weekends are actually harder because everyone is at home and requires feeding and tidying up after hmm.

I rarely sit down. I'm on the go from the moment I wake up to the moment I collapse in bed and then during the night as well. People need rest, sahp get very little rest.

I find not getting any job finished in one go and everything taking hours longer is frustrating and stressful and tiring. Also the amount of work I have to do! Constantly rushing about. Multi-tasking, no lunch break or private quiet time.

I keep reminding myself that I'm actually doing two jobs at the same time. House keeper, childcare and all other things added to it.

It is hard. It's not very stimulating either which doesn't help. I feel much more energised after a day of doing something different or adult related.

I find very few people understand my view and a lot of people think working is harder. I have a stressful, active profession yet still find SAHP is exhausting.

Catpuss Fri 19-Jun-15 22:52:26

Rinkydinkpink that's exactly how I feel! I would love it if my Dh would acknowledge how tough it can be but maybe it's just too much to expect him to understand. It's exactly that feeling of being on duty 24/7 7 days a week! Sometimes I just wish I could hand them over to a lovely Mary Poppins for a day! But I know that these years are short, as of sept I'll have 2 in school and that will make life easier and the little one is going to go to my neighbour, a childminder, for one day a week to give me some time to get my head together and plan what I want for the future. I would like to add in a little work for balance but ultimately I do want to be around while they are small.

howabout Sun 21-Jun-15 10:50:44

Completely agree with Rinkydinkpink.
One thing that helps for me is deliberately not using any free time I get to tidy / iron etc.
I actively track my "me time" to remind myself how little I get and if I have the energy I use it to do exactly what I want.
I have teenagers and a toddler so get very little head space. I am not at my best past 7pm.

Catpuss Sun 21-Jun-15 12:00:15

Oh my word, it continues into the teen years??!!

howabout Sun 21-Jun-15 16:37:19

Maybe only into the teen years for me because I also have the toddler!

Teens are frustrating because they don't need you right up until the point they do. Also evenings get taken up with homework / extra curricular stuff.

Catpuss Sun 21-Jun-15 17:52:55

Do your teens ever babysit for you?
One of the things I find frustrating about my exhaustion in the evenings is that it's the only chance me and dh have and he is good in the evenings even if he's had a knackering day. It's a running joke in our household that I fall asleep during nearly every film we try to watch together.

Hillijx Sat 27-Jun-15 19:07:02

Exactly how I feel, I find some days I struggle to enjoy it even though I wouldn't want to be away from them every day. I'm currently on holiday and I'm still not getting a rest, I cant see how people fit in "me" time. I have a 4 yr, 18 month and 3 can't go on until teens can it?!

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