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AIBU to want to get the hell out of here?

(8 Posts)
Notquitewhatiexpected Tue 09-Aug-16 22:52:05

We moved to a small village in the middle of nowhere a few months after my brother died. I was desperate to leave where we were living at the time as we had neighbours from hell, my brother had just died and not long before that my dear father had died. My husband was more than happy to look at a rural idyll, particularly as it lessened his commute. What I, stupidly, did not realise was that I would be leaving behind my support network; my close family and great friends. I somehow thought I'd be able to visit my family regularly, which I do but it's not the same as having them nearby, and replicate what I had with regards to friends where we used to live...The net result is, nearly 5 years on, I have many acquaintances, but no one who is a close friend. I live in a lovely, much bigger house, but I miss city living. I miss my old life.

Cindy614 Thu 11-Aug-16 19:03:02

I know the feeling, I moved from the big city to a small town, a few years ago, and I miss my city life.. I also do have any friends or family here like my fiancé does

Dumbled Sat 27-Aug-16 09:54:38

If you have given rural living a chance for 5 years and still not happy then seems like a change is needed

user1470997562 Sat 27-Aug-16 10:03:27

Is it possible for you to go back? I would seriously consider it if I were you. It hasn't got any better for me and I've been here ten years. We are moving soon.

Topseyt Sat 27-Aug-16 10:11:43

Rural living sounds idyllic, but isn't everyone's cup of tea.

I grew up fairly rurally, though with good connections to other towns. I went to university in a city and then also lived in London for a few years, which I quite enjoyed at the time but was relieved to move out when DD1 was a year old.

If you are used to living in a city or large town with a large network of family and friends around you and plenty going on without having to travel far for it then rural living may not be for you.

You have given it a good chance, but it hasn't worked out. You had some recent very sad losses and need your support network.

Take time to suss out property prices etc. with a view to eventually moving back when the right one comes along.

Notquitewhatiexpected Tue 30-Aug-16 23:08:53

Thank you for your replies. No chance of moving back, children are happy in school and don't want to move again, husband loves the house and garden, plus we moved from a ridiculously pricey city where house prices have risen much more than where we now live. I just have to suck it up. I will always feel like a shark out of water here, but only ten years to go until youngest child leaves school (!), then you won't see me for dust (if I haven't turned into 'one of them' by then!!).

UsedToBeAPaxmanFan Fri 16-Sep-16 17:23:52

I think it takes time and effort to make friends. We moved 11 years ago to a village where we didn't know anyone and if took 3 years before I started to feel settled. However I made a huge effort to get involved in village life - I joined the local am dram group, the village book group etc etc. I also did lots of PTA stuff which I hated but it did get me meeting people.

Now, I feel very embedded. Dc are 18 and 20 but I don't really want to move back to the nearby city.

DreamingofthePeaks Wed 28-Dec-16 10:28:55

I understand how you feel OP. We moved down south from the place I was brought up in and I have never been as happy as I used to be. My dc are in local village school, we have put lots of money into our house but I would still consider moving back as quality of life was much higher there. Happy Mummy = happy children. I would think about it. Ten years is a long time.

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