Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Does anyone else get a bit competitive with their dp over baby?

(8 Posts)
monkeytrousers Sun 26-Jun-05 14:47:04

Sometimes I feel like it's a popularity contest. I'm slowly stopping bf'ding and giving dp more time to bond with baby during feeds and naps, etc, but there are times when I find myslef getting jealous and want to start bf'ding again. I know it's nuts. Just wondererd if it's hormones or just me..

Got a shock the other day when dp came into nursery when I was trying to settle crying ds and said ^Just let me do it!^ and tried to take him off me!

weesaidie Sun 26-Jun-05 15:01:17

lol, I know what you mean.

My ex and I split when I was pg so I have always been closer to dd due to seeing her a lot more, although he sees her 2/3 days a week.

Yesterday she was staying at his and I was over there at bed time. She (14 months btw) was very unhappy about going to bed so I thought I would try and also had no luck. When I picked her up her dad came in and she held out her arms to go to him! He laughed and said, 'that never happens.'

Made me think. In sept I'll be going to Uni so the time will be a lot more equal between us as I won't be spending every day with her.... she is still far more attached to me at the moment but I could see her becoming a traitorous little daddys' girl!

weesaidie Sun 26-Jun-05 15:09:58

Different for you having live in dad and giving up bf. For me it didn't make a difference (when I gave up bf) mainly because I still saw dd far more!

If you work (or going to uni) I think it would be more noticeable with the equality in time thing, do you think that makes a big difference? Just interested due to my uni thing?

PS. Not that I think children shouldn't love their daddies as much!

tummermum Sun 26-Jun-05 15:18:29

Know what you mean MT. Didn't bf'd first child (DS)but did bf'd second(DD). Totally different experience for both DH and myself. He felt he had to make a special effort to bond with our daughter to compensate for not being able to provide that basic necessity(for the first 4 months anyway).

monkeytrousers Sun 26-Jun-05 15:20:27

I took a year off uni and am going back in September. Looks like we'll be in the same boat!

My dp is a great dad - I just feel the wrench. You sound like you have an amicable thing going on with your ex, which is a change (if you read some of the threads I've been doing lately)

When we put him into the nursery from our room it felt like he was leaving home to go to university himself!!

monkeytrousers Sun 26-Jun-05 15:24:00

Yeah, TM it must be difficult for them in those first few months when mum and baby are practically attached. Ahh well - it's just a transition period isn't it? Bound to get bumpy sometimes.

tummermum Sun 26-Jun-05 15:38:33

Yes. It's all too brief, the exclusive feeding bit. I loved it, not so much the exclusivity but the special closeness. I did sometimes hand her straight over to him for burping though!

weesaidie Sun 26-Jun-05 15:48:43

MT - yup, relationship is fairly healthy, we are 'friends' most of the time and he has always been good with both time and money towards dd. I do feel very lucky as I know for a lot of people it hasn't been so easy!

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: