Talk

Flip

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

What is wrong with me?

6 replies

Dominique07 · 11/10/2009 20:33

Hi,
I have a lovely DP and DS. DP is ill and we spend A LOT of time together since he doesn't go out very much.
However, I keep thinking and dreaming of other men!!!
I went out this weekend with my shot drinking, party-loving, childless friends (first night out and alcohol involved for a LONG time) and danced with other guys and even my best friend's BF flirted with me which I said STOP to, so I must be sending out some wrong signals for a mother and a partner!?
I feel really worried that I am so tempted by other men, one day I might do something stupid like kiss another man (or worse?) if I get drunk. Now usually I avoid alcohol anyway unless with my girlfriends...
What should I do? I don't want to break up our family unit. I feel guilty for even having these dreams!

OP posts:

Report

Dominique07 · 11/10/2009 20:40

Or is it normal, a bit of fun, harmless flirtation and home to your family. I guess it is... I'm just feeling a little guilty today for some reason. Maybe I over stepped the mark a little?

OP posts:

Report

ChunkyKitKat · 11/10/2009 20:52

Doesn't sound like you have anything to feel guilty about. Just dancing with other blokes - it's not something I would feel like doing, knackered these days, but I am in my forties!!

It's been ages since I've had a group of single friends - it must be interesting to hear about what they get up to. Your dp is poorly and he doesn't go out very much, so you are unable to get out and have time together. Are you feeling a bored and frustrated?

Report

Dominique07 · 11/10/2009 21:01

yes - those words fit me very well! Thanks... I suppose its the hangover, and the thought of for example for my BF's mates possibly seeing me in a club dancing with another guy!? No... its good to know this is ok, and anyway I allow him freedom to have fun when he wants.

Yes my friends and I had a conversation: singles verses couples - who has more fun?
Of course the singles said it may look fun, but its lonely!!!

OP posts:

Report

twelveyeargap · 11/10/2009 21:03

Sounds like your ego needed a bit of boosting. No harm really. If you feel like taking it further, then maybe it's time to take a look at your life and relationship, but a bit of harmless flirting to make yourself feel better about yourself isn't really a big deal imo.

Report

Dominique07 · 11/10/2009 21:06

Thats good to hear. Thanks for replying to me - I really don't have friend of same age in same situation to judge it by. I look at my parents and think, my mum would never behave like that!!!

OP posts:

Report

Dominique07 · 11/10/2009 21:31

Thanks for people replying I know it seems like a silly problem. I thought I should post that I just suddenly realised/remembered; its because the guys were sleazy slimballs that i'm feeling all grossed out today.

When I tried to go home the guy who bought me a couple of drinks wanted me to go back to his flat. I said no, he tried to kiss me, I just kind of smiled and turned and left... thats probably it - I didn't do anything particularly wrong, it was the fact that I trusted these sleazy guys because they were friends of a friend of a friend! MEN.