bought some cutlery in john lewis and dh asked was there anything else? I said we desperately needed some china and glassware (has been aware of this for years so nothing new), was told 'this is not the right place', you need to find one of those outlet places! Then accused me of being demading and like a child and wanting everything NOW
Well he sounds like a shitbag. Has he always been like this? If not, what triggered it off? If there is a particular cause and he has other good points, maybe something can be done (ie if he is stressed/depressed get him to the GP). What are his good points? Is he kind to the DC and involved with them? Does he pull his weight around the house (I would be surprised if he does). Is he a good shag?
From what you say about the verbal abuse, it does sound as though he is simply a misogynist who thinks that because he brings in the wages you are a pet or a domestic appliance and your feelings don't matter: is that the case?
SolidGhoulBrass, you have it in one. Married 22yrs, super successful and rich for last 15yrs, me SAHM. I have 3 wine glasses in the house! Great with DC, no sex with me (he is not interested), no affection either. Generous when it suits him.
ScaryFucker, no I do not call him names back, if I did then I could harly complain. I have said if I am so bad then why don't you find someone else, he doesnt much respond to that other than turn the tables and say if I am so unhappy then why don't I do something about it. He is manipulative.
How would I KNOW if he is having an affair? There are no apparent clues and he is always contactable and here when supposed to be. hAS SAID HE HAS THROWN HIMSELF INTO HIS BUSINESS AND DOESNT THINK ABOUT AND HAVE THE NEED FOR SEX - oops sorry for caps.
Don't you have any financial control at all? That would worry me a bit tbh.
If we need new house stuff there's no way I'd drag dh round John Lewis but I'd say in advance that I was going to buy some plates or whatever because he pays for stuff like that. I then buy it on my debit card, tell him how much he needs to transfer to my account and he does it.
It sounds like your situ is a bit more complicated than that.
Do you think the SAHM thing is giving him an excuse to treat you like a dependant child?
Ringingthechanges - he does sound like a prize tosser and name calling like this is unacceptable. Has he always been so nasty to you?
I think you need to get yourself a job so that you have some independance. Does he give you any money for food/housekeeping etc? I would also ask him if he speaks to anyone else in the same way? It may make him realise what a bully he is being (though I doubt it).