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Help me ladies - need support so that I can do this

(3 Posts)
wangle99 Wed 30-Sep-09 16:21:42

I posted a while ago under a different name how DH had asked for a divorce on my birthday and wanted me to leave. Advice on here was relationship is screwed get out.

Didn't take advice and stayed, begged to stay and have tried so much but he hasn't tried at all.

Argued this morning ending with him telling me to 'f*ck off then'. said ok will do. Have had enough can't take the emotional abuse. Have two children, DD 12 and DS nearly 6. DD is at boarding school weekly but DS obviously at home.

Today have had various texts from him apologising and i have pointed out he's apologised before. I do know its not all his fault but I have changed but he has been quite nasty (emotionally) over the years.

I can do this right? I can leave and be a strong woman? I work for a letting agents so no problem property wise!

Have appt with solicitor tomorrow as really don't know legalities of housing (we have mortgage) or divorce even.

I just want some support really oh and advice how to tell a nearly 6 year old we're leaving the only home he's known.

Thank you

mmrred Wed 30-Sep-09 17:10:49

Why are you leaving the house, just out of interest? If you are going to be the primary caregiver for DS, then you should stay in the house to minimise the trauma for him - if DH wants out, he can go.

However, if there are other reasons then of course you can do it. He doesn't love you anymore, and you are worthy of a loving relationship.

Sit down and be practical. Write a list of all the stuff you need, and when and how you can shift it. Do you have your own bank account, for example? Any joint credit cards that need sorting?

Do you have any family/friends who could support you?

groundhogs Wed 30-Sep-09 22:30:52

Sounds like you are asking the right people the right questions, but perhaps just emotionally pankicking. Understandably!

MMred's advice is spot on, i don't think you ought to leave, whatever the situation on the mortgage thingy is. You and your children need a home, to uproot them would be too unsettling.

Also, if you stay in the house, as is your right, you don't need to explain to your DC anything just yet. don't let that of all things stand in the way of you getting your life back.

Good luck with solicitor etc tomorrow, take it all one day at a time. Post whenever you can/need to!


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