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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Afternoon delight!

45 replies

MasterBater · 22/09/2009 21:33

Have been wondering whether to post this for a while.
I don't have a particularly high sex drive, and never have.
I have never orgasmed thru sex or oral, but do regularly with vibrator. Also oral and vibrator together, and anal and vibrator together.
When I say regularly, I mean for 1 week pre-period.
I take myself off to my room, electric blanket on and bury myself under the covers for some afternoon delight!!!!
I have heard that there are 3 types of orgasm. Vaginal, anal and clitoral, so I reckon that I am a clitoral orgasm-er.
What I want to know I suppose is:

Am I normal, is it normal for 42yr old women to go an roger themselves to orgasm in the afternoon while the kids are at school??

Also, how does orgasm feel to everyone else?? I think I only felt it a couple of years ago for the first time. It takes me so long to get there and when I do I want it to last forever.
It's like a pulse inside my clitoris and deeper inside which just keeps pulsing till it stops. Is that the end or is there more to come?
Sorry for all the questions. Ridiculous really at 42 to just be wonderin!!

OP posts:

Report

AnyFucker · 22/09/2009 21:35

am so sorry, but I am laughing my head off here

"roger themselves to orgasm....."

< screams >

err, yes, tis normal

bigchris · 22/09/2009 21:36

sounds about right to me

I thiunk if you have waited until 42 to experience this you are perfectly entitled to go back to bed in the afternoons
better that than screwing the gardener

Unlikelyamazonian · 22/09/2009 22:01

anyone seen my slippers

Unlikelyamazonian · 22/09/2009 22:05

know which one I'd rather have

MasterBater · 22/09/2009 22:05

No I am not screwin the gardener...not yet!!

OP posts:

AnyFucker · 22/09/2009 22:06

pmsl @ UA

MasterBater · 22/09/2009 22:07

Am I thick? I don't get that!

OP posts:

Unlikelyamazonian · 22/09/2009 22:09

if you're not masterb then I will

MasterBater · 22/09/2009 22:10

Send him round

OP posts:

Unlikelyamazonian · 22/09/2009 22:10

of course you're not thick

AnyFucker · 22/09/2009 22:11

mb, sausage vs fags

no contest ?

SolidGoldBrass · 22/09/2009 22:11

FFS don't waste a second worrying about whether you're normal or not. You're not hurting anyone and there is no risk to your health from having lots of orgasms.
But a mains-operated vibrator wil save you a fortune on batteries,don't forget to close the windows before getting going, particularly if you are a yowler, and don't believe anyone who tells you that using vibrators can cause next door's television to go on the blink.

Unlikelyamazonian · 22/09/2009 22:12

[http://www.insidesocal.com/tv/brokenTV18.jpg sometimes solid you talk horseshit]]

Unlikelyamazonian · 22/09/2009 22:13

[http://www.insidesocal.com/tv/brokenTV18.jpg try again wanker amazonian]]

AnyFucker · 22/09/2009 22:13

oh, am screaming again....

yowler

MasterBater · 22/09/2009 22:14

OMFG A girl at work once told me that she knew when her nexr door neighbour was using hers and vice versa cos the telly went fuzzy. Hope my neighbour knows. He's really quite horny!

OP posts:

MasterBater · 22/09/2009 22:15

It's like a pulse inside my clitoris and deeper inside which just keeps pulsing till it stops. Is that the end or is there more to come?

OP posts:

Unlikelyamazonian · 22/09/2009 22:15

apologies for slur

AnyFucker · 22/09/2009 22:16

oh christ, don't start making eyes at the horny neighbour...

what was that you said about your libido not being particularly high?

you are gagging for it, my love

< crosses legs and tries to contract pitiful pelvic floor >

MasterBater · 22/09/2009 22:19

bitches. all of you. would hate to be depressed and really need help

OP posts:

Unlikelyamazonian · 22/09/2009 22:20

this man is helping you find it AF

Unlikelyamazonian · 22/09/2009 22:21

sorry you're hurting

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AnyFucker · 22/09/2009 22:21

here we, here we go, here we goooooooooo

< yowls in stylee of Shakira >

Rindercella · 22/09/2009 22:21

And keep your curtains open closed in case the window cleaner comes round

AnyFucker · 22/09/2009 22:22

oo, he looks rather nice, UA

Flip

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