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Bondage/role play or deeply scary shit?

(10 Posts)
RealityIsNOTDetoxing Wed 16-Sep-09 14:31:06

Message withdrawn

BeautifulFlame Wed 16-Sep-09 14:33:37

Deeply scary shit I would say.

wheniwishuponastar Wed 16-Sep-09 14:43:34

has she spoken to him about it? if she doesn't like it then she doesn't need to stay with him. does she like his dominating personality generally? if not, then it doesn't sound like a good relationship. how long have they been together.

Malificence Wed 16-Sep-09 15:02:04

I love rough sex, being spanked, bitten, hair pulled etc. but that sounds nasty to me and if my husband had a look of anything other than lust and enjoyment in his eyes it would kill the mood immediately.

Fantasising about killing someone during sex can't be healthy?

I couldn't deal with hands or anything else around my throat, totally freaks me out.

When you see some of the truly scary stuff some people are into like mutilation then I do wonder if they are psychologically damaged in some way?

RIND - I agree totally with your comments on the thread.

warthog Wed 16-Sep-09 15:03:19

the fact it carries on outside the bedroom, and the death threat worry me.

i've heard a lot about dominant / submissive relationships and in my experience, it's the dominant ones that seem to be happier. in my experience. because the dominant ones have a duty to look after the submissive that is very easily forgotten.

i would get the fuck out of that relationship and change the locks just in case.

PersonalClown Wed 16-Sep-09 15:08:51

I'm with you RIND.
Me and DP do enjoy the rougher side of things but we would never dream of saying something like that.
I am one that DOES like a little mock strangulation. Maybe it isn't that as it's more DP holding me down rather than actual strangling. Hmmm...

But we have strict rules on it's only to be done when both are in the mood for it and when asked to stop, it happens IMMEDIATELY.

And DP is one of the most loving, respectful men I have ever have known in my life.

doggiesayswoof Wed 16-Sep-09 16:30:13

I'm like you PersonalClown, I also think it's more about being held down.

Reality I agree with your posts on t'other thread too.

What OP describes sounds nasty and if the friend is questioning it and being freaked out then surely that is enough?

LynetteScavo Wed 16-Sep-09 16:39:54

Deeply scary shit.

Will end in tears.

I'd be out of there like a shot.

Mamazon Wed 16-Sep-09 17:41:12

i posted on the other thread but i'll say it agian here.

The fact that they are boht enjoying the BDSM is fine, but the fact that he is taking it further than she is happy with is wrong.

if she feels scared or worried at any time then he should stop straight away.

if she does not trust him totally she will not enjoy herself.

I think she needs a very open conversation with him and she must admit that she felt scared.

DangerousSex Wed 16-Sep-09 21:54:00

Thank you ladies. I have just post a reply in the original thread in chat.

Mamazon she could talk to him but he is very manipulative and charming and she is so in love with him.

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