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Relationships

Is it really better to give then recieve?

6 replies

AnitaMann · 11/09/2009 13:18

Namechanger here to spare my

So. Have been seeing a new man for a while now, and we have a very active and fulfilling sex life. Apart from one thing. He doesn't really enjoy 'going down' on me

He has assured me that it's nothing to do with my personal hygeine or anything - i always make sure i'm clean ect - but he says he 'has to be in the mood' and although we've been together nigh on eight months now, i think he's only done it maybe three times.

Thing is, i really enjoy it, and whenever he does do it i have the most amazing orgasms, which makes me want him to do it all the more.

Obviously i don't want to force him to do it - i only want him to do whatever he's comfortable with, but it's driving me mad!!

I enjoy giving him oral sex, and he enjoys it too, so i know he doesn't have a problem with recieving it.

Gah - am more then a little frustrated!!!

OP posts:
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shootfromthehip · 11/09/2009 13:20

Nothing to be about... you want what you want but also have to accept that it may not be his 'thing'.

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kormachameleon · 11/09/2009 13:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SheWillBeLoved · 11/09/2009 13:24

Sympathies - exDP used to have to be really horny to go down there. Not because I'm an ungroomed, unhygienic rotter it's just not something he'd dive down to do during a normal session. But it was something he would do if he was in a rather dirty mood

Can't say I minded too much, and never nagged him to chow down as that is just a mood killer - I enjoyed it more when he went down there of free will.

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Deemented · 11/09/2009 14:19

You need to talk about it... put an emphasis on how much it turns you on to see him down there.. do feel the stubble on his chin on the inside of your thigh, rct...

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diddl · 11/09/2009 14:36

Well it´s not really fair if you´re doing it more for him than he is for you,IMO.

He doesn´t have to do it every time you want, but why is it a problem for him?

Is it that he´s more interested in his own pleasure?

Too lazy/selfish?
Not very good at it?

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randomtask · 11/09/2009 14:50

I had an ex boyfriend like that except he really didn't enjoy it-he tried a few times and TBH, knowing he didn't enjoy it killed the mood for me rather than him. In fact I went off with someone else who would often rather give than receive. Not entirely due to that but it did help.

A bit of advice I was given before my wedding was 'you should give 60% of your attention to your OH and expect 40% of theirs'. Don't think they were talking about sex but it kind of fits.

Talk to him about it and explain you really really enjoy it. Maybe once he knows how much you're enjoying it (as loudly as possible....) he'll cotton on.

Good luck!!

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