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Is it really better to give then recieve?

(7 Posts)
AnitaMann Fri 11-Sep-09 13:18:39

Namechanger here to spare my blush

So. Have been seeing a new man for a while now, and we have a very active and fulfilling sex life. Apart from one thing. He doesn't really enjoy 'going down' on me blush

He has assured me that it's nothing to do with my personal hygeine or anything - i always make sure i'm clean ect - but he says he 'has to be in the mood' and although we've been together nigh on eight months now, i think he's only done it maybe three times.

Thing is, i really enjoy it, and whenever he does do it i have the most amazing orgasms, which makes me want him to do it all the more.

Obviously i don't want to force him to do it - i only want him to do whatever he's comfortable with, but it's driving me mad!!

I enjoy giving him oral sex, and he enjoys it too, so i know he doesn't have a problem with recieving it.

Gah - am more then a little frustrated!!!

shootfromthehip Fri 11-Sep-09 13:20:10

Nothing to be blush about... you want what you want but also have to accept that it may not be his 'thing'.

kormachameleon Fri 11-Sep-09 13:24:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SheWillBeLoved Fri 11-Sep-09 13:24:35

Sympathies - exDP used to have to be really horny to go down there. Not because I'm an ungroomed, unhygienic rotter grin it's just not something he'd dive down to do during a normal session. But it was something he would do if he was in a rather dirty mood blush

Can't say I minded too much, and never nagged him to chow down as that is just a mood killer - I enjoyed it more when he went down there of free will.

Deemented Fri 11-Sep-09 14:19:29

You need to talk about it... put an emphasis on how much it turns you on to see him down there.. do feel the stubble on his chin on the inside of your thigh, rct...

diddl Fri 11-Sep-09 14:36:52

Well it´s not really fair if you´re doing it more for him than he is for you,IMO.

He doesn´t have to do it every time you want, but why is it a problem for him?

Is it that he´s more interested in his own pleasure?

Too lazy/selfish?
Not very good at it?

randomtask Fri 11-Sep-09 14:50:57

I had an ex boyfriend like that except he really didn't enjoy it-he tried a few times and TBH, knowing he didn't enjoy it killed the mood for me rather than him. In fact I went off with someone else who would often rather give than receive. Not entirely due to that but it did help. grin

A bit of advice I was given before my wedding was 'you should give 60% of your attention to your OH and expect 40% of theirs'. Don't think they were talking about sex but it kind of fits.

Talk to him about it and explain you really really enjoy it. Maybe once he knows how much you're enjoying it (as loudly as possible....) he'll cotton on.

Good luck!!

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