Advice and sharing workload at home.

[lulalullabye]

Hello, I work one night shift a week and the rest of the time look after 2 dd's. I clean the house, do most of the cooking, all the washing, all the shopping and the general day to day house stuff.

Do you think it is unreasonable of me to ask dh to do something more round the house other than work and then come home, eat dinner and sit down.

At a weekend he does spend time with the dd's but no housework. Today I sent a txt message, which wasn't the best thing, but have a go at hime because he didn't wash any of the pans from last nights dinner.

Do you think I am being to hard on him ??

[FlamingoBingo]

No, I think he is being very lazy. In our house, we do our own work when he's out of the house, and share everything 50:50 when he's home.

[NotPlayingAnyMore]

No, of course YANBU.

[ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight]

No. IMO the one at home does the general chores of the day (tidy, wash up, jobs like go to bank or whatever) and if you are both home then you share them. Bigger cleaning jobs should get shared as and when they are required (although to be fair my DH only does them if I nag). Often, DH and I tidy up together after DS is in bed, whoever has been at work that day. His working day is often very long and physically hard so I tend to let him off if he has had a long day but otherwise he is expected to do his share.

Full time work is 40-50 hours a week. Childcare and housework is 84 hours a week minimum. I reckon at least 20 hours of home stuff should be done by the working parent

[if only it were that easy]