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I feel so low and unsure on my relationship with DH

(4 Posts)
gembobs Thu 03-Sep-09 01:30:31

I had been taking the mini pill but i felt it was making me moody so came off it and since i have come off it i have felt really depressed, which i am going doctors for.

Since the 1st August my husbands son (14yo) came 2 live with us (my ss), the child also suffers ADHD, i have felt pushed out, feel they don't include me in things, when my husband goes anywhere his son follows and then gets moody if he don't go as his dad says no, he lazy he expects us run around after him aswell as our 2yo and 3mo and if we tell him 2 do anything we get the moodiness and he says u do everything for the 2yo, we don't get any us time at all.

I just feel as though we aren't going 2 work at all.

mathanxiety Thu 03-Sep-09 04:45:00

Time for your Dh to sit down with his son and explain the difference between meeting the valid and reasonable needs of a 2 yo versus the whims of a 14 yo. Your Dh has to set limits for his son, which will benefit the ADHD as well as your relationship.

gembobs Thu 03-Sep-09 16:31:59

my point exactly, but he won't and just lets him 2 get his own way all the time

mathanxiety Thu 03-Sep-09 16:37:38

That is going to backfire on your DH eventually because he will end up trying to keep you, the small DCs and the sulky teenager all happy and will not be able to. Is he feeling guilty about his past father-son relationship with the teenager? Maybe you could bring up your concerns in a way that makes it seem like you are very hopeful about that relationship and how much good it will do for the teenager's ADHD, and want it all to be the best it can be and have some suggestions about setting boundaries and getting some respect for the DH from his DS. If you make it seem like you want things changed for your sake only, your DH may feel he is being asked to choose between you and his teenage DS.

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