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Would you be suspicious or am i just being paranoid?

(48 Posts)
HmmmWhatDoYouThink Sun 23-Aug-09 12:02:06

Message withdrawn

Disenchanted3 Sun 23-Aug-09 12:05:54


She spiked his drink? She tried to get him drunker?

Only 1 reason she would do that to him IMO.

And why take condoms with her??

Put and end to it, now.

Disenchanted3 Sun 23-Aug-09 12:06:22

She does not sound like a friend.

PlumBumMum Sun 23-Aug-09 12:09:20

Completely agree with disenchanted3

LoveBeingAMummy Sun 23-Aug-09 12:10:00

Maybe you should speak to her.

myredcardigan Sun 23-Aug-09 12:10:05

I think all the danger signs are there. I find it a bit odd that when you mentioned it to your DH his reply was that she wouldn't as she loved you and kids too much. Whereas my DH and most happily married men would say, 'I'd never do that to you and the kids.'

Stop this developing into something everyone will live to regret.
Good Luck.

PlumBumMum Sun 23-Aug-09 12:10:18

And if she loved you and your dcs why is she trying to get your husband out of his tree when you are at home with a new baby??hmm

Malificence Sun 23-Aug-09 12:36:17

Your husband shouldn't be going out with female friends alone, full stop.
She is behaving appallingly and he should have the sense to tell her she won't be a mate for much longer if she carries on.
I don't know how you've kept hold of your temper with her tbh.

FabBakerGirlIsBack Sun 23-Aug-09 12:38:24

You know what is going on and you need to tell her to cut it out or you will cut her out and tell her dp what she has been doing.

moondog Sun 23-Aug-09 12:42:02

Yes, I'd wonder why a man with a newborn is choosing to go out and get shit faced when he should be home looking after his wife and kids.

More than worrying about her actually?

Why do you put up with this?

PitysSake Sun 23-Aug-09 12:43:13

I bet he cant beloive his luck!

twoclimbingboys Sun 23-Aug-09 12:46:55

It sounds unreasonable of him to be going out so much to be honest. Regardless of with, but especially under these circumstances. I would be suspicious.

PitysSake Sun 23-Aug-09 12:47:48

to the OP
jave you looked at his phone recently?

mrsboogie Sun 23-Aug-09 12:59:29


I think this is one of those situations where you will later look back and think "wtf? I was mad to allow that to go on" but while it is going on you don't want to leap to conclusions.

One of you(preferably him) should call her and say that while he has been happy to be a shoulder to cry on, you will be needing your DH at home to help you with the baby for the foreseeable. And say, perhaps when the baby is a bit older we can all go out together.

He should be with you, not out with her 'til all hours.

Let her find her drunken revenge fucks somewhere else.

ilikeshoes Sun 23-Aug-09 13:04:47

This woman is supposed to be your freind??? this situation is wrong on soo many levels, she should respect the fact that you have a baby and should not be encouraging your dp to go out on drunken nights, and your dp should be with you,There may not be anything going on between them but there are obviously other issues and she does not sound like freind to me.

HmmmWhatDoYouThink Sun 23-Aug-09 13:10:18

Message withdrawn

ilikeshoes Sun 23-Aug-09 13:14:42

If you had just read your post as an outsider, what would your advice be?

PitysSake Sun 23-Aug-09 13:14:46

what do you mean hmm
i meant
have oyu checked his phone

slartibartfast Sun 23-Aug-09 13:19:22

The three of you could look at the thread together: that might clear the air on the fears you all have: a bottle of red wine first could help.

FabBakerGirlIsBack Sun 23-Aug-09 13:22:37

That is a crazy idea.

FarkinBarkin Sun 23-Aug-09 13:44:14

You've both been trying to be a friend to her in different ways but tbh I think you both need a little space from her for a while. If not then I think in the long term your friendship is going to suffer badly.

Leaving aside the issue of whether or not there is more to it, the drink-spiking is dangerous. If your dh is driving he could lose his licence. It's also not ideal when he has a newborn to look after.

If she's feeling suicidal then perhaps now is the time for her to seek some professional help. She's your best friend but there are limits to how much you can be expected to deal with.

PitysSake Sun 23-Aug-09 13:45:33

agree red wine silly idea

LOVE the name farkin barkin
please let me have it

sunfleurs Sun 23-Aug-09 15:31:50

If I had one piece of advice for the messed about on it would be this: Stamp on it the first second you catch a whiff of anything going on. Because once it has started you are too late. They have usually fallen in lurrrrrve by then and it will just be endless further heartache. Even if you are wrong the boundaries are clear. I speak from bitter experience.

sunfleurs Sun 23-Aug-09 15:42:19

Or even if you there is nothing going on but the situation looks dangerous. Like this one in fact. Your friend is heart broken, she is not thinking straight, no matter how close you all are when she is pissed and sad she may be the kind of person who would do anything to alleviate that.

ChocHobNob Sun 23-Aug-09 15:45:09

What on earth would they be talking about in the car until 3:30 in the morning? hmm

I don't think you're being paranoid. Why does her support from the both of you have to come in the form of going out and getting pissed? Why can't both you and your partner support her in your own home together?

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