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need advice on how to talk to DH

(2 Posts)
godawfulsmallaffair Wed 19-Aug-09 22:37:31

This is by no means a big deal compared to so many other relationship problems, but I feel so distant from my DH and feel like he doesn't particularly like me very much. We have a 9month old DS who is just brilliant and DH is veyr good with (most of the time). Our sex life is back to normal and DH tells me a lot how sexy I am etc...but I'm not feeling sexually attractive towards him because I feel like other than being a sex object and someone who does the chores he doesn't care about me.

I might be totally blowing this out of proportion but since DS was born DH has become more selfish, introverted, spends what feels like all his free time at home on his bloody laptop or playstation, he's very defensive with me, whenever we're talking and I make suggestions about anything he's very quick to argue the opposing point, whatever it is

I'm worn out with trying so hard to be amenable - I'm shit with confrontation but am feeling miserable, I want to tell him how I feel so wqe can sit down and sort it out but I know he'll just get all fired up and defensive. I'm working pretty bloody hard at the mo so we're not seeing much of each other - he took DS away for 2 weeks on a holiday and a) I actually really enjoyed the freedom though I missed DS hugely and b) DH doesn't seem to have particularly missed me

sorry it's so long....

Spero Wed 19-Aug-09 22:41:45

It is a big deal if you feel that your husband doesn't like you and if he'd rather spend time with his lap top. This kind of behaviour destroys relationships over time and he needs to understand this.

If he won't or can't talk to you about why this is making you unhappy and what you can both do to make it better, then I think you need to investigate counselling.

Good luck,

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