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Can you just give me a little kick up the backside

(3 Posts)
herestoabetterfuture Fri 10-Jul-09 18:02:35

I'm separated from h. His choice not mine.

Having counselling, doing a lot better (almost) in myself. however, hes going away and we've been spending time together before he goes with our DC so unfortuantely him and I ended up fooling around (not sleeping together but you know).

Can someone kick me up the beeeehind and tell me to stop doing this?

I don't feel fantastic after, in fact I feel numb and stupid. What a wally.

It's happened more than once (but it is getting lesser, so I guess that is good????!) And I don't feel like I desperately need his attention. I almost at the point of being fine without him.

So why do I do it? Am I just making excuses? Go easy on me...it's been a tough year

sunfleurs Fri 10-Jul-09 18:04:51

Try to think of it like this. Every single time you do that with him you are going right back to the start of getting over him. Try and imagine it is like starting a long drive and then turning back at the end of your road every single time only to start again. Is that not a really depressing thought?

TheProfiteroleThief Fri 10-Jul-09 18:16:48

I would not think of it like that. You have been married, had children and loved the man. The separation is his choice, so of course you have residual feelings. Being human and loyal you fooled around.

You are feeling more distanced from him - you can decide not to do this again.

Whilst I am not an advocate of revenge sex, sometimes a 'date' with someone else might help you make the next step without him.

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