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Where do I stand regarding maintenance?

(10 Posts)
AllyMcBeal Thu 09-Jul-09 12:29:19

My (d)h and I are on the verge of splitting up, so I am just wondering where I will stand?
I have a ds and am a SAHM, although he is not his biological son, and I already receive maintenance from ds's father.
We share a home obviously, and he has always supported me financially as I don't work.
Obviously I will now need to find work, but I am just wondering whether or not I am entitled to anything from him towards my son's upbringing? As I will only be able to work part time and I am just not sure I will be able to cover all costs on that and my current maintenance payments.
Has anyone been in a similar situation?

unavailable Thu 09-Jul-09 12:33:09

No, I dont think you are entitled to anything - your ds is not his son.

KingCanuteIAm Thu 09-Jul-09 12:33:21

I am pretty certain that you cannot claim maintainence from a step parent for a step child - especially if you are already getting it paid by his dad, why would you think you could? hmm

BitOfFun Thu 09-Jul-09 12:36:09

If you work at least sixteen hours you should get tax credits which will boost your income. Maintenance sounds like a non-starter to me. A divorce settlement might award you some maintenance for yourself I guess, but I wouldn't bank on it. You'll be fine if you work though, honestly. What sort of job will you be able to do?

AllyMcBeal Thu 09-Jul-09 12:55:35

Not sure what work I could do - anything really to start off with I suppose.
I only asked re the maintenance as I had looked online and it said that in certain circumstances the court can award maintenance for step-children - but can't see anywhere what these circumstances were.
Also (d)h has always supported us since ds was 2, obviously alongside maintenance from ex.
I'm not a money grabber or anything, but if I am entitled to something then I am not going to decline it.
Sorry, I was not married to ds's dad and we had an amicable split so I have not had to go through this before.

idunnop Wed 22-Jul-09 10:19:05

I found this online:

The courts may make maintenance or other orders with respect to a step-child who is a ‘child of the family’, that is a child whom the step-parent has treated as their own child. The court is to consider in such cases whether the step-parent has assumed any responsibility for the child’s maintenance, and if so, the extent to and basis upon which they have done so, and to the length of time for which they did so. It will also consider whether the person knew that the child was not his or her own, and the liability of the child’s natural parent to maintain the child."

So it does sound as if you may be able to claim some maintenance for your DS, although whether that is "fair" is another matter entirely.... I think you would have to speak to a solicitor to get a definitive answer, as it will depend on your exact circumstances.

VinegarTits Wed 22-Jul-09 10:26:29

'and the liability of the child’s natural parent to maintain the child'

If you are already getting maintenance from your ds natural father then i dont think you can claim anything from his stepF

Surfermum Wed 22-Jul-09 10:27:50

I would have thought that if the child's father wasn't involved at all and not paying maintenance, then maybe you'd be able to make a claim. But I can't see that you'd be entitled to anything.

There's another thread asking the same question, and what I said on that was it's down to the childs parents to support that - and that's you and his dad.

Is your xh going to continue to have contact with your ds?

idunnop Wed 22-Jul-09 11:31:19

I guess it probably depends to some extent on what your DH has been contributing so far and therefore what effect it oit would have on your DS if that contribution was suddenyl withdrawn. For example if he had been paying private school fees and therefore your DS might have to change school at a particularly disruptive time to his education, I would imagine that would have a bearing.

However, you do also need to ask yourself what you genuinely think is fair. Is this something you could discuss with your DH rather than immediately going down the legal route? Does he consider your DS to be his son or not really? You don't mention how long you've been married....

ChocHobNob Wed 22-Jul-09 15:55:46

The fact you are already in receipt of maintenance from your child's BF would sound like you wouldn't be entitled to anything. Like someone already asked, will your ex H be seeing your son once you've split. He may we willing to organise something between the two of you but I wouldn't expect it and if in the same situation, would try and make myself financially stable without relying on it.

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