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I did two terrible things

(8 Posts)
kat2907 Sun 05-Jul-09 12:59:59

Message withdrawn

posiedullardparker Sun 05-Jul-09 13:02:39

The first thing you should do is go and see your GP and get yourself some professional help. What you did is terrible if you don't react appropriately. Without action you accept that what you did is okay and send a message to your husband that he is deserving of a physical attack.

Tortington Sun 05-Jul-09 13:06:28

you might still be over the limit if you wee really that pissed perhaps you shouldnt have been driving with your kid in the van at all.

you sound like a couple of drama queens - 15 year old darama queens who wants to make eveyr thing about them

either go on a fucking communication course or have done with it - poor little kid


posiedullardparker Sun 05-Jul-09 13:07:34

Agree that you shouldn't have been driving too. Get some help and give up drinking, two things you can do.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight Sun 05-Jul-09 13:09:38

No I wasn't over the limit - I stopped drinking early in the night but stayed out late. I wasn't actually drunk when I got back but in the aftermath of being a bit drunk.

I appreciate your input but I'm not sure this is drama queenish behaviour. Anyway, thanks.

spicemonster Sun 05-Jul-09 13:15:53

If someone tells you they want a divorce, a normal reaction is not to attack them. DV is still DV even if it's a woman assaulting a man.

You both need help - Relate or your GP. That's a terrible atmosphere for a child to live in so for his sake, you need to sort it out.

HecatesTwopenceworth Sun 05-Jul-09 13:39:41

Do you ever have a conversation about your behaviour (both your behaviour) when you are calm? When there hasn't been a trigger that has got you attacking each other?

You simply cannot have a discussion, a sane and reasonable one at any rate! when emotions are high. What you need to do is to say to your husband "We need to talk about how we behave with each other and try to agree some changes. When would you like us to have this chat?"

Because that gives you both time to think about the points you wish to raise and it isn't springing it on him! - he is unlikely to respond well to a sneak attack! grin

The important thing about any discussion you have is that you both talk and you BOTH listen! I have known people use timers and whathaveyou to ensure both parties get uninterrupted talking time with the other one truly listening and not trying to butt in, or talk over them.

If he cannot or will not agree to talk (and listen), then you have a bigger problem and maybe need third party help.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight Sun 05-Jul-09 13:47:13

Yes we do. In fact we did last evening before I went out. I thought some things were out in the open and on the way to being resolved. We will try again tonight I think.
Thank you

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