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Sister wants a separation - afraid husband won't leave her house - what can she do?

(5 Posts)
bowlofcherries Mon 29-Jun-09 10:14:08

My sister has been married for 6 years and don't have children. Her husband has a problem with drink. He is a member of AA and can go for long periods without drinking but always seems to go back to it. They get on okay when he isn't drinking. He's had a couple of heavy sessions recently and she has had enough. They've been here before and when she has said she wants an end to the marriage he has always said she won't get him out without a fight. He moved into her house - still in her name - and still had a house of his own to sell which he did eventually. But for the first 3 or 4 years he contributed nothing to the running of the household. In the last couple of years he has started to pay some bills -(not the mortgage though) as if he knows that this will give him some rights if they separate. He has money from the sale of his house which he has been dipping into so I don't know how much money he has left. My sister is seeing a solicitor today. Just wanted to know where she stands if he refuses to leave - would she need to get a court order? I guess she hopes that separating will give him the shock he needs to possibly change his ways although she knows this is a very long shot. Anyone been in or know someone who has been in a similar situation? TIA

bowlofcherries Mon 29-Jun-09 10:37:20


Cosette Mon 29-Jun-09 10:52:53

I don't think she can force him to leave the house. All of their money and the house will be considered marital assets, with the presumption that everything will be split 50/50 in the event of divorce. If she brought more into the marriage, then she might be able to negotiate something different, but I think that would be dependent on his agreement.

If she wants him to leave the house (and buy him out?), then her best bet is to file for divorce, and get a financial agreement agreed as soon as possible.

I have no legal expertise (but did do my own divorce many years ago). Be interesting to see what her solicitor advises...

bowlofcherries Mon 29-Jun-09 11:24:18

Thanks very much for your response Cosette and sorry to hear of your experience. They are both on holiday this week and he just came in from the garden to see her list of solicitors. He said he would move out if she wanted him to but wouldn't move back - first time he has said something like this. She has an appointment for Friday and is trying to get another sooner. Apparently his AA sponsor told him a few weeks ago that if she left him he would be dead within a year. Strange thing to say - if it was said at all - as he's not exactly a 3 bottle of whisky man a day.

bowlofcherries Mon 29-Jun-09 17:56:44


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