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I need divorce advice

(3 Posts)
abigproblem Sat 13-Jun-09 20:57:39

Our realationship is dead. seperate rooms for 4 years, no mutual respect. DH is controlling and verbally abusive. he claims if I leave he will fight for custody despite having no interest in DC 4 and 6. never does parties, swimming lessons, homework, joins us on days out at weekends. went away for 1/2 term he had lie ins everyday and I took them out on my own3 days. i just want to start again and not be treading on egg shells all the time. things will get worse when he knows and I just feel like packing up in hols

howtotellmum Sat 13-Jun-09 21:27:31

just so your post doesn't go unnoticed.

I have no experience of this, but feel for you.

What next? See a solicitor, see the CAB, get your finances sorted and in order.

Have you anywhere to go? Family? friends? Can you afford to rent?

Not sure what to advise- others might suggest you stay put in the family home.

Best see a divorce lawyer asap.

Alambil Sun 14-Jun-09 21:36:38

0808 2000 247 - national DV helpline; they'll tell you all your rights and support you throughout it all

You may not need to leave the family home - they'll help you find all that out

Don't believe him about taking the children. All abusers say that - they know it'll keep you too scared to do anything....

Usually, unless you are unfit as a mother the children will stay with you due to you being the main care-giver, so don't let his threats scare you - he can spout hot air all he likes, it ain't what usually happens (he'll have rights (for him and for the kids) and contact - but not full "custody" usually)

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