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Is DP being fair or am I being unfair? I've had enough

(4 Posts)
Bunnysoprano Thu 04-Jun-09 19:28:21

DP and I moved in a year ago together. He has one friend who is married with a child and really quite a noxious person. His is married with a child but cheats on his wife repeatedly and seems to think that lying for your own gain and to the detriment of your friends in totally acceptable. Both he and my DP are dentists and my DP works one day a week with him in a practice. The friend treated a patient incorrectly and then tried to blame my DP. Separately, any interaction we have with him ends up causing arguments between DP and I.

I have told DP that I don't think this friend is a good friend for him but that he is an adult and therefore I will not "stop him seeing the friend - I cannot do that. However, I WILL NOT allow the friend to impact negatively in my life as I do have a choice in that.

After the patient incident, DP thankfully gave him a wide berth for a while. I work very long hours and DP and I have not seen each other much recently. Today I worked from home as I was waiting for a furniture delivery.

I spent my "lunch hour" preparing a nice meal for DP and was really looking forward to seeing him as it is a lovely night here and we have just had garden furniture delivered. I thought we could spend some nice time together sitting in the garden; particulary as DP is going on a stag weekend tomorrow nightfor the whole weekend with said noxious friend (NF)too.

DP called me en route from work and said that
NF was coming round in twenty minutes or so to see DP's new car. I said to DP that, actually, I was looking forward to seeing DP, the food was in the oven and couldn't DP - at least - ask him to come a little bit later. I also said to DP that I had friends coming round for dinner (as he knew) to keep me company while he was away so I really needd help to build the new garden furniture as we wanted to eat in the garden.

DP told me that he couldn't tell NF to come later (WTF?). That he had agreed to go out for drinks with NF too?! However, he would take NF out immediately on arrival so that I could at least eat the food myself and not have to see him.

I am now writing this sitting in our bedroom (have super greasy hair and no make up as was working at home and was going to have a shower about the time that NF turned up). Rather than taking NF out, DP is in garden with NF and my carefully prepared food is burning in the oven as no f**cker had bother to turn it off.

I know that I sound as though I am about five but I am really, really fed up and f**cked off and am seriously wondering whether I want to spend the rest of my life with such (as I see it) selfish prick. We can't even sort this out as he will be out all night and then leaving for the stag weekend tomorrow while I am at work.

I've had enough

Heated Thu 04-Jun-09 21:17:58

I really thought this post was about the not-so good friend. The bit about leaving dp after a burnt dinner came out of left-field for me.

Is your complaint that dp puts his friends first before you? Or more a concern that show me the companions he keeps and I'll show you the man?

LoveBeingAMummy Fri 05-Jun-09 09:21:03

Hope you are feeling a bit better today

Bunnysoprano Fri 05-Jun-09 21:03:04

Hi Both

As this was the first time I posted, I accidently posted two threads blush.

Thank you v much for replying to me though. I do feel much better today and posted an update on the other thread.

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