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would you accept this?????bit long

(4 Posts)
clare1980 Sun 17-Apr-05 14:41:42

i have just moved in with my dp, we met over the internet which is ironic as his xw ran off with some she met on line. in dec i used his phone to call my mum and wanted to see some pics he had taken on a day outwiv me and dd, i saw all and more in the shape of pics from his xgf centre flod type saying for old times sake, they were dated 12 dec so i decided to read txt and she and he had been txting each other quite a bit.
i went mental and he promised it would stop and i thought it had, i was cleaning out the drawers in the dresser and came across his moblie bill which has 6 different numbers other than my no that he txts all the time, at first i was mad and planned to move out but after thinking about it decided to keep it a secret that i knew.
Also he doesnt come in from work til late so i was in bed asleep and he was being sneaky with his fone, i woke up and he wasnt i bed so i decided to go to the loo and then see where he was he was in the toilet and as soon as i walked in he hid the fone i went mad again but he said he was emailing me which i know was crap.
i love him dearly and i know he loves me too but i aint sure whether to drop the whole thing or do something about it i have writen the nos down and was gonna get my friend to call them but i dont really want her involved as she dont like him anyway. Any advice welcome cheers clare

NomDePlume Sun 17-Apr-05 14:53:28

I think you need to talk to DP about it rather than torture yourself with this is he ?/isn't he ? stuff. Talk to him. If you believe what he's saying stay but be wary, if yu don;t then leave.

clare1980 Sun 17-Apr-05 15:04:19

i am trying to lok at it from his point of view and he is very shy and cant hold conversation very well with people he dont know and as there is a big age difference between us he is sure i will bugger off like xw and has even said i am waiting for you to leave and i said i wouldnt and he said not if but when.
i understand when xw left was a knock to his confidence
And also it doesnt help that i am very friendly to everybody i meet but this is just my nature but i feel it is wrong to txt other people, dont get me wrong i have friends i txt and i am friends with almost all my xps and we all keep in touch and if this is the case then i understand but he has never had that many xps.
Also i have just started a new job and was wearing a vest top and he said it was provocative but ffs it is from tescos on ann summers and he also commented on me wearing purfume to work.
if he can comment on these things i think i have a rite to know who and why he is txting other people

mancmum Sun 17-Apr-05 15:08:24

think you should be very wary here -- he has some big issues still with xw and if he is not beinghonest with you about who he is texting, can you trust him?

I think relationships without trust are doomed -- even if there is nothing going on as the insecurity will eat away at you... have a very big talk with him, set some goals in terms of his changing his behaviour and becoming more honest... give him time to achieve them and if he does not, I would walk...

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