OK.. couple of things?
First and foremost I meant to bring no pain to anyone who has a downs syndrome child. I know that downs children are not necessarily unhealthy .. unless they have a heart problem of course? but they do have some level of learning disabilities which makes the mother?s life harder. I sympathise and admire you, if you are reading this and you are affected. And I know that there are benefits too, so I wasn?t trying to talk down to anyone and there was definitely no intended ?eeegh? in my post because it would be insulting and anyway it is absolutely not how I see such a life. My point was only that it is harder work which seemed to be a significant issue already for the OP.
Second I avoided all mention of having to make an abortion choice because I know exactly what I would do if offered such a choice and I did not want anyone to be hurt by any criticism of making the other choice. So anyone who read that into my post should read it again if they were offended by it. I will not give my views on abortion here and I think it is such a deeply personal thing that it unfair of anyone else to be judgemental on this issue either.
Third, my main point was that it is very wrong to plan to have a baby without the father?s consent. If you are pregnant already then that is one thing, but choosing to make the man a father to another child should be a joint decision. The OP wasn?t suggesting that BTW.
Fourth, in response to the poster who declared herself a mother of six and said my post was borderline offensive. Why? Did I imply that I did not think big families were a good idea when both parents want them? Or was it some other aspect? Need to agree with father before conceiving? Increased risk of ds as you get older? What??
Fifth: Only child syndrome is a term used to describe the characteristics often displayed by children and adults who had no siblings. There are other ones for ?oldest child?, middle child and youngest child too. My understanding of only child syndrome is a person who has not benefited from having siblings to play with, fight with, compete with and learn to share with. Sometimes they are lonely, sometimes they are self centred, sometimes they are very thin skinned when the world does not offer them strong approval. And sometimes they are none of these things. It?s a common term in every day use, does not apply to every only child and I am not trying to theorise, just describe my understanding of what is meant by the term. You can get your own descriptions by typing it into Google.
I really get fed up when people are so politically correct that they go out looking for contraventions of their policies. I think it is a very unpleasant way to behave, as is the much loved mumsnet roasting which I think could be likened to collective bullying, similar to the kind which is sometimes demonstrated by some children at school.. Frankly you may not like me in RL or you might think I am great but one thing is for sure, you absolutely do not know me right now so it is too early to think about roasting me, if that is the sort of thing you are inclined to do.
No word of this applies to the OP btw.
Just to add ... Berolina.. where on earth did you get the stuff about not owning property? Or are you not talking to me?