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Just need to RANT / pre-natal depression

(7 Posts)
3in3 Wed 01-Oct-08 00:03:58

Hi all, Just joined mumsnet and I am pleased that i can heave a sign of relief that i am not the only person who struggles with their other half and in laws. I realised only last week (after years of them being in my life) that my mother in law and 2 sisters in law are infact evil, manipulative, judgemental, sacastic, self-rightious "$*"$£&!!! My partner (who i have a strained relationship with anyway) and his sisters laughed, in front of me, when discussing me recently getting punched in the face by a man who got angry with me after he nearly ran into me because i didn't move my 8 month pregnant body quick enough round my car in a car park. The punch didn't leave a mark but its knocked every last ounce of fight out of me.

OH MY GOODNESS, i feel so incredibly alone in this over hormonal, tired pregnant state. CAN ANYONE TELL ME is there such thing as pre-natal depression? And is anyone else feeling the same way? I need a hug and to be told it'll all be ok but my partner can't stnad to come near me and only speaks to me to moan about money. i handed over every penny of savings recently (50k from selling my house) to lighten the load and all he does is check the phone bill and tell me to watch every penny. So to add to all the other negative feelings in me, i feel trapped.

Sorry, i told you i needed to rant.

On a lighter note, in all this madness, i can proudly say that i have 2 very beautiful children, who i adore, and my 3rd will be in my arms in a few weeks so i'll have my little gang (who have my surname not his) to keep me going.

Dragonbutter Wed 01-Oct-08 00:16:24

rant away.
welcome to mumsnet.
might be a bit quieter this time of night.

sorry you're having such a tough time of it.

Flowertots Wed 01-Oct-08 05:56:15

Am gobsmacked that they could laugh about such a disgusting attack on a pregnant woman. That was their son/daughter/neice/newphew that could have been hurt! SHOCKING!

London08 Wed 01-Oct-08 06:52:12

Rant away. I have been up since 2am stressing about life in general. The company I work for just went into administration / liquidation and I have to find a new job @ 10 weeks preg. Just lost all the maternity benefits I would have been paid and feel dillusioned. Husband does not even seem that excited about first baby and seems to be looking at everything like it is doom and gloom. He has his own business and it has not been doing so well - credit crunch. Just feel everything is a stuff up at the moment!
Am really pleased about the baby!! But do feel like I am doing it on my own. Haven't even told his folks yet because they will probs make a comment like "It's not the best timing" etc. But saying that they are not malicious. You really should voice your opionions that their attitude and comments are frankly disgusting. And you should tell your husband that he needs to buck up as well and that the only way to move forward is working together as a team because the current situation is bringing you down and you are looking at your relationship in a new perspective. I don't belive anyone is trapped. There is always a choice. Stand up for yourself and address your relationship issues. It may seem hard but it is hard struggling with the same issues every day. It will be liberating and hopefully give him the kick up his backside that he needs! Good luck. wink

lizziemun Wed 01-Oct-08 07:00:14

Rant away, can i ask if you know what your partner did with the money you gave him.

And yes you can get prenatal depression here.

joyfuleyes Wed 01-Oct-08 08:30:59

You poor thing

Ante-natal depression does exist - some people think it is at least as common as PND - it tends to be poorly diagnosed.

I've had it in all my pregnancies & already feel like I'm losing (lost?) the plot, & I'm not even 6 weeks yet.

3in3 Mon 06-Oct-08 21:08:55

Hi everyone,

Thank you so much for all your support. Its nice to know that you didn't think i'm completely nuts.
Firstly, the money went to pay off some of the mortgage, so i infact own more of the house then him but (you will spit blood at this) my names not on any mortgage paperwork or anything. I even had to sign a disclaimer to say i won't claim squotters rights if the house ever gets re-pocessed because we're not married. Argh!!! Believe it or not, i am quite a level headed person but have been a bit silly over recent years.
To London08, wow, your head must really be spinning!! i can understand why you were up so late. For all the hormonal problems i have been having i will never let anyone take the joy and love i have in my heart for my kids, no matter what the b*t*ds say or do they will never stop me from being the babies mummy and having that connection to them. Concerning your husbands disinterest to your pregnacy i can tell you that my partner is totally emotionless and didn't show much care or support when i had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy and then didn't jump for joy when i fell pregnant again. I do know that some men find it hard to get excited about something they can't see or feel BUT to see his face when we had our scans (which now totals 9 over the 3 pregnancies) did show me that he was/is bothered, and he did shed a few tears when my first 2 babies were born. I'm sure your husband will be ecxited when you have your scan just make sure he goes with you, noone else! Thank you for your advice, I will definitely have to have a serious chat with my partner.

Thank you all for giving me reasurance about prenatal depression. I don't feel so alone in my crazy head now.

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