As some of you know dh and i have had many problems over the years. We are trying to work things out but i'm wondering if we'd have a future anyway. I haven't felt he's fancied me for aboyt 4/5 years of the time we've been together( been together 7 years). Even when we were having sex regularly it was nearly always initiated by me ( he was usually willing) and the sex was unadventurous to say the least. I feel he is very prudish about sex. He's never been intersted in trying anything different - just me on top or him on top. He knows how i feel and says he does fancy me but i don't feel it. I'd love to feel like a woman ( i make lots of effort with my appearance, so it's not like i've let myself go since being with him at all) and not just a a person he sahares a house with. My previous partner fancied me incredibly and was very passionate and adventourous with sex. I left him for dh when i was on antidepressants which clouded my judgement terribley and also killed my sex drive - so at the time that side of things wasn't terribly important. it's only been in the last couple of years that i've been free of anti depressants and can see things clearly. I'm 99% sure i wouldn't have left my previous partner if i hadn't been on the ad.s However we now a a 2yo ds and the majority of the time dh is a great dad to him. Another problem is that because of all the horrific rows dh and i have had (and violence from both of us in the past) i almost don't feel it's right to have sex with him. If i cuddled him i always have have hand "curled up" - i can't lay my hand falt and open on him - sounds silly, i know. I can't bring myself to say i love him and i'm not sure if i do (he knows this). I'm wondering it its worth trying to save my marriage and what's best for ds?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
how important is it to feel "fancied" by dh and have good sex? (v long)
mymittens · 30/09/2008 09:04
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.