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Apparently h's 29yr old ow is more fun and happier than me! No Shit!!

(104 Posts)
WhirlingStirling Sun 28-Sep-08 18:08:11

I am not really looking for a response. I know I will just feel better ranting for a few minutes.

We were trying (again) to see if we could make things work after his affair. He had promised (again) not to contact her but told me last night, when questioned, that he had taken her for lunch just 2 weeks ago when he was in her country. He hadn't offered this info - yet again I had to question him. So, she is more fun than me and they can go out whenever they want (guess what?? She has no dc!)

He doesn't really want to be married to me anymore but he still wants things to carry on as normal in the house, for the dc's sake. So he thinks I will still be cooking and cleaning for him angry

Well (as Custy so eloquently put in an earlier thread) Fuck Him and the Horse he Rode in on!!

You know - I am feeling slightly better already! Thank You

WhirlingStirling Sun 28-Sep-08 18:09:25

p.s. used to be stirlingmum

lillypie Sun 28-Sep-08 18:11:29

What Custy said shock angry sad

blinks Sun 28-Sep-08 18:12:16

i remember your story (am namechanger also)... you already know the answer methinks.

i'm all for an immature revenge fling.

Imnotok Sun 28-Sep-08 18:13:27

He will learn when he is a very lonely sad old fucker man .

Servalan Sun 28-Sep-08 18:14:34

Anyone can be "exciting" when we don't experience real life with them and can impose our fantasies on them.

Sounds like he needs to fucking grow up angry

Glad the rant is helping.

theinsider Sun 28-Sep-08 18:14:56

Tosser. Doesn't he realise it's his actions which have made woman A (ie you) miserable and no fun (not that I'm saying you are!) and that his rotten personality will have the same effect on woman B sooner or later?

Hope you sort things to your satisfaction. smile Sounds like you've still got spirit, well done, mke sure you keep it.

SmugColditz Sun 28-Sep-08 18:17:12

I hope he gets leprosy of the bell end

WhirlingStirling Sun 28-Sep-08 18:17:56

Thanks all - just keep feeling really low but at the moment I can feel the strength returning smile

You know blinks I am all for an immature revenge fling - I really need it to be honest - just dont know where to look for right bod!!

WhirlingStirling Sun 28-Sep-08 18:18:49

Thanks smugcolditz - you have made me laugh for once today grin

KerryMum Sun 28-Sep-08 18:23:23

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland Sun 28-Sep-08 18:24:38


dump the mother fucker already.

ambercat Sun 28-Sep-08 18:24:39

God, these men really are on another planet!

My h said his 24 yr old ow made him realise what a relationship should be like!!!!

Unfortunately for him she didn't realise what a great relationship they had and dumped him a couple of months ago!!

I think my h thinks things will carry on as normal at home aswell, he wants to have his nice family time and be cooked for and cleaned up after and then go out and fuck around with no guilt cos we're not together anymore.

Stirling, rant away, the more i think about things the angrier i get so its good to have an outlet, prevents a murder!!

noonki Sun 28-Sep-08 18:28:02

poor you

my friend had a similiar scenario about 2 years ago, after she found out about the affair he wanted to stay around

after about 4 months of him staying in the house and being an utter wanker she finally flung him out,

she has now moved towns (To where she always wanted to be), has a better job, better (but smaller) house, a lovely new man, and best of all no him. Her confidence has soared, he was always criticising her and dragging her down, he hardly did any housework or childcare so no change there and all in all she is a MUCH happier bunny.

I was with her nearly everyday whilst they were living in limbo, so you have my ever sympathy, I had a glimse of the pain you must be in, poor you

I hope it all gets better soon (())) x

AbricotsSecs Sun 28-Sep-08 18:59:54

Message withdrawn

Cryptoprocta Sun 28-Sep-08 19:03:20

OK, this is rather crude, but Chris Rock makes a good point...

"What's important to you? That is the question.

Commitment will give you a headache every now and then.
New pussy always clears your mind.

But you've got to think about life in the long term. People tell you that life is short. No it's not. Life is long. Especially if you've made the wrong decisions.

And in the long term, if you're sick, is new pussy going to take care of you? No.

If you're hungry, is new pussy going to feed you? New pussy can't cook! New pussy can't even read!

If you've got a baby, is new pussy going to teach him how to read? New pussy's illiterate!"

WhirlingStirling Sun 28-Sep-08 19:07:12

Thanks all - Yes Noonki, the living in limbo is hell - it is so hard to describe to someone - you just want a clearer view of your future but that is so hard when you are with someone who doesn't know what they want.

Hoochie - it is important to try to stay together for the dc but I have never believed in staying with somoeone just for the dc - I grew up with my Mum in a shit marriage and it was awful, she really should have walked away when we were little but she thought she was doing the right thing.

I just feel, very sadly, that I have now recreated that past, and my dc will also have an upset childhood. No matter what anyone says, I feel a failure for that.

WhirlingStirling Sun 28-Sep-08 19:11:35

rofl Crypto - I shall have to ask him what his new pussy can do. Second thoughts - I dont give a shit!

Servalan Sun 28-Sep-08 19:17:00

Hang on a second here - you are NOT a failure. You are fab. I think it's one of those things that come with parenthood - we feel guilty whatever we do!

This is down to your h's immature, self-indulgent behaviour. HE has put you in this situation. You are doing the best you can.

So there.

AbricotsSecs Sun 28-Sep-08 19:28:44

Message withdrawn

WhirlingStirling Sun 28-Sep-08 19:30:42

I know servalan but it is still hard to deal with - I honestly thought that I would do things better/differently but then it creeps up on you and then Bam you are your mother. Frightening!

AbricotsSecs Sun 28-Sep-08 19:30:47

Message withdrawn

WhirlingStirling Sun 28-Sep-08 19:32:57

I should also admit that me and h's credit card went shopping the other day and we got a couple of lovely jumpers and I have booked a hair appointment at an expensive salon next week. grin

ggglimpopo Sun 28-Sep-08 19:42:41

As they say:

"Love over cocktails is so sweet,
but twill it be the same o'er shredded wheat"?


anothermum92 Sun 28-Sep-08 20:57:59

Message withdrawn

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