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Romance - How do I describe it to a lovely but neandarthal man?

(5 Posts)
laurawaterford Fri 19-Sep-08 12:38:43

my DH is truely lovely. However I miss romance sooo much. I can no longer describe to him what it means - I just sound a bit silly and whiney!! What words can I use to describe to him what romance is in a language he will understand? Are there any books that HE can read? He doesnt even like the word 'relationship' cos it sounds all fancy kind of thing! He is a very caring intelligent man but does not have a grasp of what it is I am missing and want. Things like, hugs in passing. Interest in who I am not just how my day is, romantic dinners that are about handholding and connecting. Occasional flowers for 'just because I love you..' I know it all changes with family life and age but oh I don't want to live the rest of my life not hearing what it is about ME that is loved and special. He can't even understand that need. He thinks just being married is statement enough! (married 8 years. 2 children)

Any advice PLEASE.

laurawaterford Fri 19-Sep-08 12:39:05

should read 5 children (between us)

expatinscotland Fri 19-Sep-08 12:39:55

You don't.

If you wanted all this romance bullshit business why did you marry him in the first place?

SpandexIsMyEnemy Fri 19-Sep-08 12:40:38

little post it notes?

I think it depends on what your define romance as as we're all different.

for me a nice dinner, ready run bath with bubbles, etc is nice and romantic.

cheerfulvicky Fri 19-Sep-08 12:49:32

Some men just don't 'do' romance. Others are brilliant at it but they aren't always the best partners so beware. And of course there are some women who don't set much store by it, and others to whom its really important.
Why have you stayed with him for so long if he is lacking in an area you find so important? Or is he a star in all other ways?
My DP isn't that romantic, but I love him like crazy and I know he loves me. He's not big on cards or candlelit dinners, but from stuff he's said I know he'd be devastated if we weren't together in the future. And he shows his love in ways that aren't obviously romantic, like doing up the house or doing favours for me, doing the cooking etc.

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