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Don't read if squeemish...TMI

(119 Posts)
TooGross Wed 10-Sep-08 10:20:00

Hi. I have name changed for this, for reasons which will become obvious!
I have been seeing a man for a while now, but he has a 'bedroom habit' which I find really REALLY weird and just wondered if I am just out of touch or am I right in thinking this is really bizarre.
Ok...(deep breath)...blush...when we've had sex, he lifts the covers, points down to his 'manhood' and says 'clean me up then'! I asked him what he meant the first time he said it and he said that unless I (so sorry for the graphic description) sucked and licked it clean he would get sore!!!! When I refuse he gets really affronted, like I'm rejecting him sexually, when there's nothing sexual about it. he's already 'shot his load', sex is finished and in my opinion he's just too lazy to get up and wash it, so expects me to give him a bed bath with my mouth!!! I mean, it's cold, congealed...his AND mine IYSWIM.
Is this really odd? I sure as hell think so.

Pinkjenny Wed 10-Sep-08 10:20:44


Sorry. That's just wrong.

tiredemma Wed 10-Sep-08 10:21:11

Lazy oik.

Keep some baby wipes by the bed and tell him to clean himself up.

Majeika Wed 10-Sep-08 10:22:20


vile man!

I would have to dump him!

TMI for a Wednesday morning!

Kewcumber Wed 10-Sep-08 10:22:45

worng and controlling/bullying. "you first" as I pointed at my bits would I'm afraid be my response.

Dropdeadfred Wed 10-Sep-08 10:23:13

If this was something you had 'offered' to do then it would be different.

What about suggesting he has to do the same for you? grin
Or just throw a packet of babywipes at his dick...?hmm

chopchopbusybusy Wed 10-Sep-08 10:23:43

I really hope this is a wind up - and if it's not why are you still seeing him?

marmadukescarlet Wed 10-Sep-08 10:23:57

Humiliating and wrong (particularly if it makes you feel uncomfotable) imho

TooGross Wed 10-Sep-08 10:24:01

I did. I pointed to mine and said 'clean me up then' and he said 'no bloody way'.
Majeika...I did say don't read if squeemish!!! smile

oops Wed 10-Sep-08 10:24:32

Message withdrawn

TrinityRhino Wed 10-Sep-08 10:26:35

what a tosser
thrw some baby wipes at him
and then tell him no to let the door hit him in the ass on the way out

MadameCastafiore Wed 10-Sep-08 10:28:09

Oooohhhh Oven Cleaner and a Brillo Pad at the ready next to the bed and then stick your Marigolds on and get scrubbing - what a tosser!

TooGross Wed 10-Sep-08 10:30:49

oops...that's what#s's nothing to do with sex, it really isn't. He literally wants it washed and 'put away' for him. If it was part of sex then I'd maybe feel differently, but to me it just feels humiliating.
chopchop...actually I'm not still seeing him, even tho it's not officially over I've not seen him for a while and he hasn't been in touch with me, as with everything else in his life he thinks he shouldn't have to do any of the work!

MoChan Wed 10-Sep-08 10:32:33

If anyone said that to me, they'd be out the door. Or I would.

Is that really true? I can barely believe it.

2beornot2be Wed 10-Sep-08 10:32:58


TooGross Wed 10-Sep-08 10:35:04

MoChan...unfortunately it is true. I am a regular poster and have a long running thread going on at the mo on a different subject, but you'll understand why the name change.
It just struck me as very peculiar behaviour, and as someone else said it's controlling. Almost submissive behaviour is expected. I could go into more detail but I don't want to offend anyone.

Dropdeadfred Wed 10-Sep-08 10:37:16

What would he have said if you had just poped to the bathroom and brought back a warm flannel?

if it's not sexual then why does it have to be done with your mouth???

TooGross Wed 10-Sep-08 10:40:06

DropdeadFred...No idea. I guess because it meant he didn't have to get up out of bed, and didn't have to wait??? I really don't know.

Kewcumber Wed 10-Sep-08 10:43:09

its not sexual but its not practical either toogross. Its deliberate humiliation which he gets a kick out of - its why he gets cross if you won't do it.

beanieb Wed 10-Sep-08 10:44:27

Does he ask everytime?

I would think he should give up after the first refusal and to keep asking is the weirdest thing of all!

Dropdeadfred Wed 10-Sep-08 10:44:36

He sounds like he has real issues...hmm
Get rid ....

TooGross Wed 10-Sep-08 10:46:33

I'm ashamed to say I did do it a couple of relationship, didn't want to seem prudish etc etc...but then I said no, and told him to do the same to me to which he was appalled. So I stopped, but yes...he did keep asking. In fact he didn't ask, he would just lift the covers, raise his eyebrows and gesture downwards.

muggglewump Wed 10-Sep-08 10:47:08

There's nothing wrong with that if you both are happy with it but the way he has said it would make me tell him to fuck right off.
If he didn't quite get the message I'd apply my foot to the area firmly!

wuzzlefraggle Wed 10-Sep-08 10:47:26


TooGross Wed 10-Sep-08 10:48:51

Theer are other issues I think Dropdeadfred...he displays some quite strange behaviour. He won't use the toilet unless he has babywipes to hand...even carries a pack to wotk with him in his bag. I mean, I'm all for personal cleanliness but he panics if he doesn't have wipes. he sits down to pee...on it's own I don't mind this as it avoids pee stains on the loo! But when you add it all together it's just...weird.

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