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God how the hell do you talk about MONEY!!!!

(5 Posts)
TheGoddessBlossom Mon 01-Sep-08 15:22:16

it is the one topic that can change DH and myself from laughing joking having a rellay nice dadoor slamming shouting and resentment on both sides.

I have always earnt, and more than DH till I went part time after having the two DSs. Have just been made redundant and as we have considerable savings was hoping to take my time, get another part time job, spend some time with our pre-school children. But no, he is on my case instantly, "gotta a new job yet? Well if you can't find anything part time you will have to find something full time" etc. Then we have the "Well how much do you need a month from the savings?" and he suggest some ridiculously inadequate amount that wouldn't even fill up my car, never mind pay my phone bill, the kids swimming lessons, entrance to even the local soft play a couple of times a month, the odd coffee...he has absolutely no idea.

I am not extravagant, I don't buy clothes, shoes, the boys have huge wardrobes as they have male older cousins, I am careful with money. But he just has no insight into what I need to manage on week by week with two small children, and THIS is why I always work and want my own money.

God I hope i can get another job soon.

scorpio1 Mon 01-Sep-08 15:24:37

i always find that if i talk to dh about money, i write down a sheet with what we have, and then what needs to go out.

you need to tell your dh what amount you need, and show him what on if nessecary. (bills, lunch, bits and bobs)

stoppinattwo Mon 01-Sep-08 15:39:28

TGB.....angry I know exactly where you are coming from!!!!

sitdownpleasegeorge Mon 01-Sep-08 15:49:30

TGB I soooooo understand that phrase "THIS is why I always work and want my own money".

Why are you responsible for paying for the kids swimming lessons/soft play sessions - surely that is a joint expense ?

I think a lot of men have the potential to be absolute arses about money if they were sole breadwinners as in my parents day.

TheGoddessBlossom Mon 01-Sep-08 19:27:06

He is a total worry wart as he is a self employed builder and I know he is concerned about the credit crunch, but I am not stupid and I do intend to work again. But to think there is going to be a seamless link between this job and the next is just stupid.

Am going to do a list now so he can see just how many legitimate essential outgoings I have a month and how his figure is just on another planet.

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