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male drinking .

(10 Posts)
bec40 Sun 10-Aug-08 19:24:51

my h rang me friday evening following leaving his place of work to tell me he was having a few beers with friends .He said he would be back at 18.30 but by 19.45 hadnt come in to me who had been at home all week with an 8yrold and 3/12 old baby .Exhausted ! .I rang him and got a very drunk response on the line and a mate who i dont know telling me to F... off .Nice ah .I took kids to my mothers as i really didnt want kids to see him drunk .He came home (dont know what time ) and vomited down the front door .Nice ah .Just feel he is taking the mick really and feel worthless .Any suggestions .Hate him at the mo .

aleene Sun 10-Aug-08 19:30:00

Sorry to hear this. That is horrible for you. Was he remorseful the next day?

bec40 Sun 10-Aug-08 19:39:48

Yes he was sorry .Told me he loved etc .But feel very angry with him as we had an episode when my d was 6/52 old and he went to the pub because i was getting fed up with the state of the house .He came back and threw 2 garden chairs up the garden and i felt quite intimatated by his behaviour so put kids in the car and he then took my d from the car seat and took her back in the house .I was terrified by this point and ending up calling the police .They removed him from property and again the next day he was remorseful and sorry .I asked him to agree that he would never drink to this extent again and he agreed but as you know he has done it again .I am not sure that i want this anymore .he also has debt problems which i think are contributing but he doesnt know i know .

aleene Sun 10-Aug-08 19:50:17

Okay so maybe he is drinking to get away from his debt problems. Can you not talk to him about this? My friend had this problem with her partner and it was a big relief for him when the problem was out in the open and he didn't have to hide it anymore.

bec40 Sun 10-Aug-08 19:59:41

yes will be able to talk with him .what do you think about accepting him back home and after talking he did it again .Has your friends p done it again since .?

expatinscotland Sun 10-Aug-08 20:03:20

This man is unable to control his drinking and is violent whilst drunk.

You need to extract yourself and your children from this situation.

You have tried talking.

It hasn't worked.

His reasons for drinking are his and if he can't admit they are wrecking his life then you need to save yours and your children's whilst there is time.

Maybe you can have a talk with a counsellor after he's been sober and demonstrated he's commited to being sober for good because he obviously can't handle drink responsibly.

bec40 Sun 10-Aug-08 20:12:59

Thankyou for your honest words .He s Father drank and abused his mother .Maybe its in the family .Im dont feel like i love him anymore anyway .I feel so upset with him .I promised my S that i wouldnt have him back in the house .

expatinscotland Sun 10-Aug-08 20:14:59

Go back and re-read your posts.

This relationship is over because he is a violent drunk.

Start taking steps to make it over.

You and your children deserve more than this.

expatinscotland Sun 10-Aug-08 20:15:43

Try contacting al-anon to get yourself some support, too.

bec40 Sun 10-Aug-08 20:20:08

ok will do .thankyou .

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