I'm so angry. I told my 'male' friend last night that I had a job interview and after congratulating me he made some underhand comment about me getting fill time pay for part time hours, unlike him who has to "slave" for 40 hours a week.
To cut a long story short it erupted into a row where he was saying stuff like "single mothers think the world owes them just because they happen to have kids...if they'd kept their legs shut they wouldn't be in this position to start with, why should the tax payer help them out". He called single parents "baby machines" and said the whole problem with Britain is that people don't work at relationships, they just break up because they know that the tax payer will provide for them . I asked him what, for instance, battered women should do and he said they shouldn't have kids with violent people that the term domestic violence is used too readily when half the time its just the woman whinging that everything doesn't go her way. I asked about couples who have affairs, he said they should stay together and go through relate.
Apparantly if people planned properly there would be no single parents. He then went on to say that if single parents insist on being single they should get a loan rather than "tons" of tax credits to see them through until they are able to pay back their debt to society.
Half of it was so nazi'sh I actually began to wonder if he was just trying to wind me up. This is a bloke that has only ever had one serious relationship and that ended because he was an immature twat and was mean to her kids.
He's also openly racist, constantly speeds in his car and has recently been arrested for dangerous driving.
What makes me laugh is that he says he would aways be "too proud" to sign on the dole and would always ensure he paid his way....yet this is a 27 year old bloke who is STILL living at home FOR FREE with his parents and pays absolutely NOTHING towards the cost of running the house.
Oh god - I have a friend like tis. Just tell him you pity the day he enters the real world and has a proper relationship himself, but not to worry - you'll help him pick up the pieces when life doesn't live up to his exacting standards.
My MIL made similar comments once, a long time ago (yes she is a DM reader) to me and I am a lone parent adviser (FFS, know your audience, woman!). I chewed her ass off, quoted some research and destroyed her argument. She volunteers for Home Start now and has completely changed her views. There is hope.
many cases of domestic abuse starts when the woman gets pregnant. and what about people who lose thier partners through death - they should then sue medical staff for making them a single parent. and loans would def work wouldn't they, cos lets face it - if you were given £20,000 to live for 2yrs while bringing up your baby you would want to pay it back wouldn't you - now where's the incentive to find work? and this is your friend? i hope you don't have enemies - god knows what they must be like. what a lovely person he is.