Back history.....
Fell in love age 17, he didn't love me, felt out of control, ended it. Year later he came back, smae scene, I ended it again. The day he first kissed me I thought I was going to pass out
Month later me the man who I married. I loved him but was never IN love with him. 12 years on we divorced. That was 10 years ago. I had one mini relationship, again loved but not in love. Ive had casual friendships/sexual partners in the last 10 years
So now, I met someone online. We met a month ago after chatting for a year as friends. We talked all night, had a snog which was fabulous. Everything felt very natural, no awkwardness. He's attractive, solvent, funny, fit etc
He is a workaholic, very open so I know it is only work (I have his home address, home phone and brothers details, all he offered up) He doesn't answer his phone very often or answer texts very often either. I have been very laid back and tried not to be on his case, even tho I want to lol Work is his life, he works 18 hours a day, 7 days a week, that isn't going to work is it?
So we had dinner last night, which was lovely. He told me he really likes me and wants to date, that I'm wonderful. We came home and had amazing sex. Now the crunch, I had to stop briefly as I thought I'd pass out again. Is that lust or love?
I hate this feeling!! And I know this isn't a normal reaction. I have spent all day with butterflies and that feeling you get before you get on a rollercaoster. I want to run and tell him I can't do this, but I know that is a stupid reaction
Am terrified of getting hurt, is it better to hurt now or later, but then I want what normal people have
How do you have the courage to try in relationships? I'm a strong woman, I work, I raise my kids on my own, I do all my own diy! Why does this scare me so so very much and how to stop these butterflies? What if he isn't feeling anything?? God I'm a wreck
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
If this is love, I don't want it!!!!
scaredoflove · 04/08/2008 17:10
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