Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.
Glam & fab part 7 - from strength to strength(1001 Posts)
Thought I'd start this one off on a positive spin? Hope you all find it..
Hi, just popping in to check up on everyone. How's things? Baffy - hope things are going well for you. My baby is 8 weeks old today it's whizzing by. Very busy.
HELLO Ernest! How's it all going? Tell us more!
Off to see Halvorsen this morning, bit nervous. Having had houseguests all week I have not done all the reading or prep that I wanted to.
H has said he will try to come to the appt which is amazing. Work is crazy for him right now so tbh, I am not expecting him to make it. The fact that he wants to is enough.
Going to take dd to Hamleys afterwards. Better leave credit card at home LOL!
UC, things have ben slowly (slowly) improving since he got his own place in Feb.
Hope everyone else okay.
Wow Ernest hello! Great to hear from you
How's things going?? Give us a full update when you can!
PC good luck for today. I'm glad H wants to go. I hope he can make it.
You want positive? I can do you positive.
I moved into my own little housie last week. Things in boxes and plastic bags all over the place still as haven't got enough cupboards in yet, but it feels like home already. One of my first purchases was a super squashy recliner chair for the lounge, which I said was Mama's chair and no-one was to sit in it unless they'd earned my special approval. It doesn't work out like that exactly, but the boys do seem extra keen to make me cups of tea etc for some mysterious reason. No telly yet, but at least my broadband is up and working, as you see. (XH had to fix the wiring for me - true to form though, he's left the phone socket half way across the room with all the wiring exposed, so I'll probably have to get an electrician in to tidy it up.)
XH does have a tendency to turn up every evening, sit on the floor, demand the boys make him coffee and criticise my housekeeping (!), but I don't have to listen to him and will chuck him out if he gets too annoying. His own house currently has no electricity or water as he feels too poor to get them connected. DS4 may have to live with me until he gets that sorted or SS may have something to say.
Downside is, a truck reversed into my precious Astra the other day, so am being tested on my resolve to walk more before I really felt ready. But this is probably a good thing in disguise. Probably.
I've read the whole G&F thread and am with you all, even if I can only burble about myself at the moment. One thing I really, really want to hear is that Baffy made that wretched H eat his thrice-damned mobile. The other thing I want to hear is that Dior refuses to have sex until her H puts on at least two stone, as she's never found skinny men attractive. Apart from that: excelsior, everyone!
Good to hear from you Annie. House sounds great and just what you need
I haven't made him eat the mobile (yet!) but I'm sticking to what I've said and I'm not continuing to spend time with him until he stands up for what he wants, puts me first, and tells her the truth. I really won't be the OW in my own marriage.
But it's bloody awful at the moment as I've taken some time off work today after the week from hell, and him and ds have gone to see Bob the Builder at this kids centre which was my idea as I know ds will love it. But... in sticking to my word I'm now sitting in alone while they have the day out, even though they both wanted me to go with them
I refuse to back down this time. And if he doesn't tell her the truth, then we're not getting back together anyway, so I suppose I'd better get used to it! Might as well start today.
Oops... forgot about the positive thing...
Ok on the positive side, I am going to make a bacon butty and eat it in bed with a big cup of tea and a box of chocolates
Could never do that with ds here!
Then when I get my beautiful little boy back later we have a family party to go to and I have the most gorgeous new dress. So pampering session this afternoon for me I think!
There. Feel better already!
I just don't understand, myself - I mean I can't imagine XH being unfaithful anyway (he'd have had to wash more often for a start) - but how a man can calmly sit there with his wife, texting his girlfriend, Planet WHAT?!?! And after you'd asked him not to? Even when my self-esteem was at total rock bottom, I would have grabbed the bloody phone and stomped it to death - or worse, if he happened to be bending over . But I think you explained that yourself when you said the last time you told him you wouldn't put up with it any more, you really meant it. Up till now you haven't really meant it, so he kept thinking he could get away with it because the fact was he could. Now he can't, and this is where the story really starts. Is there a real man under the skin, or does he just reflect whoever he's with, loving and helpful when he's with you because that's what you are like, a psycho when he's with SG, and who-knows-what when he's with the "nothing goes on honest" work colleague? The world will be a better place if he chooses you...
ps Have a nice peaceful day without the fellows! By God have you earned some "you time".
Hi everyone, like the positive thread name UC - I named the last thread when I was feeling REALLY down! still feeling stressed at work but have reached the point where I think oh well, if it doesn't get done by 5pm, it doesn't get done by 5pm. At least it's fresher since the rain last night.
Baffy, you are doing well sticking to your guns.
PC - step away from the credit card !
Ernest - Hi - great to see you on the thread - how's the baby?
Annie, lol at your destination for the phone . I can't believe Baffy's H thinks it's ok to text OW when he's with her - just hoping her firm stance forces him to face reality at last. Glad you're enjoying your new house.
Just warning you all I won't be around for the next few days. Will be getting the room ready for our first student tomorrow, then off with DP and his company for a couple of days on Alderney - our hosts have a new house by the sea and I can't wait to see it. I also love the tiny planes we fly out on - DP hates 'em but he hates flying anyway. I was tempted to cancel the whole thing when DP was at his lowest, but glad I didn't at I really think/hope we might be heading in the right direction again. I've been following TFM's advice not to keep discussing our problems but concentrate on making good memories with him, and it seems to be working.
well, dd has now had her measles jab. i am an emotional and physical wreck.
H did make it on time altho only because Dr was running late but either way it was a huge relief he was there.
cried when we left, really hope we have done the right thing.
took dd to hamleys this afternoon, it appears to be a credit crunch free zone in there!
great fun, spent too much
baffy, good on you. hope you've enjoyed your day of "me" time and the party is fab.
annie, great to see you back. you do make me giggle!
tannee, aldernay sounds fab.
h was supposed to be coming this eve to talk and for dinner but apparently it's all going wrong at work again. very frustrating especially as i could really do with a drink but mustn't as might end poorly child this eve.
Hi all, yes, still at work but just about to go home.
Dior, it's good that you're standing up to him. Sounds like he sometimes forgets that he only has one child in the house, and you aren't it. If I ever met him, I wonder if he'll resemble my image of him? Basically, a Victorian pater familias who goes out to work every day and expects to come home to the Angel of the House who awaits him with warmed slippers and a hot 3 course meal ready? .
Everyone else, hope the weather is good for all of us over the next few days. Alderney gets fogbound sometimes, and planes can't take off or land - so keep your fingers crossed.
Sounds great Tannee - hope the weather is ok and that you have a fab time. Hope all goes well with the student staying.
Baffy - WELL DONE Enjoy the pampering and do tell about the new dress
Dior - well done on the pound weight loss. Nearly a stone - excellent work I won't comment on your h if that's ok
HW - have a lovely holiday. Well deserved
PC - Hope all goes well with Halvorsen appt.
Hi UC, Ginnny, McD and Lilyloo......and everyone else. Lilyloo - hope you feel better soon.
I'm off clothes shopping today Dh taking me for a surprise city break (as in I don't know where)late next week. New job still going well. Met 4 of my patients. They are all lovely
Thanks for the welcome - lovely lot of people here!
Agree with Tanee about Dior's H. I picture him with a high stiff collar, very Upstairs Downstairs, like a school friend's father who we were all rather afraid of. Dior's answer was absolutely right. Hello, adult human being here - some respect please?
PC, DS4 had the everything-in-one-go jab when he was about 18 months. It came up in a nasty lump on his leg and he was quite poorly and tetchy for a couple of days. He soon got over it though, and hasn't had any noticeable symptoms since - nor, most importantly, any of those nasty diseases. He is now a well grown, scarily bright 11 year old. We have to make these decisions for our children that feel wrong at the time, sometimes, and it's right to question and explore all the choices as you did. Now forgive yourself!
ERNEST ..... hope it's all going well with lo and your back to update very soon we have been thinking of you
Baffy so glad you stuck to your guns it's a tough one that as you don't want to cut your nose off to spite your face either iyswim. I guess that will come when he decides if you are together or just co parenting. But for now i think it's best to show him in actions so he will hopefully do the same.
PC hows dd today ? Hope she was fine for you can imagine that was very stressful but glad h turned up too.
UC well done on the positive slant let's hope it's a good omen for the thread
LL enjoy the clothes shopping hope you got lot's of lovey things. How lovely a break for you both. Are things going ok at the minute ? He seems to be trying ?
Tannee hope the weather holds for you (fingers crossed)
Annie sounds very positive bar the astra
Dior he seems to be a bit stressed out about something doesn't he. Maybe it's not you but think you might need to do more digging ?
Well feeling much better and running round like a madwoman Thanks for all the well wishes just need to cross fingers for sunshine tom. I must be bloody mad. I am now thinking barbecue / bouncy castle / 50 people / rain / cream carpets
On a positive not though UC it will be sunny , everyone will have a lovely time and it's all for my beautiful dd
Have lovely weekend all
Fingers crossed for good weather tomorrow lilyloo. Hope your dd has a lovely day
right, i've been woken up way too early on a sunday and i/we had a totally crappy day yesterday so i'm in a bit of a strop!
Dior get rid of that tag line on your blog NOW! It's a lovely picture of you and if you keep presenting yourself as fat then that is what people will think.
you are not fat FFS! Okay, so you may not feel 100% comfortable with your weight (but really, what grown adult woman does whether slim or not?) but you have to get out of this "fat" mindset.
You're doing brilliantly with your diet/excercise regime and you're seeing results. Don't undermine yourself by telling people what to think of you. Respect them enough to allow them to make their own opinions and respect yourself enough to not let any negative opinions affect you.
You're a beautiful, sensitive, caring and very creative woman. Hold your head up and be proud of yourself.
This thread is not accepting new messages.
Please login first.