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BIL is sometimes so annoying... I need some good responses to shut him up....please help!

(18 Posts)
2point4kids Tue 22-Jul-08 08:26:39

My BIL really irritates me sometimes as he is quite immature (imo!) and does things it seems, just to get a reaction.
The most annoying thing I find is that he always says to me 'so when are you having the next one?' meaning another baby.
I've got 2 boys, youngest is only 5 months!

I've tried saying 'you'll have one before me', I also tried saying 'We're happy with the 2 boys actually' and he replied 'oh are they so bad they've put you off having more?' grrr

Last time he saw us he said 'so when are you going to have a girl then?'
I really wanted to say something ride, but PIL's were there too and I would hate to upset them as they are lovely so I just blanked him lol.

What can I say to shut him up???

RubyRioja Tue 22-Jul-08 08:30:10

I would say, next time you are planning procreational, rather than recreational sex, you will phone him first to check it is OK.

theexmrsfederer Tue 22-Jul-08 10:07:04




KaySamuels Tue 22-Jul-08 10:08:42

maybe you should just pity his inferior conversational skills and give him a sympathetic look

EffiePerine Tue 22-Jul-08 10:17:35

Ignore - sounds like he just wants to get a reaction

you could combine with a withering look grin

Dropdeadfred Tue 22-Jul-08 10:21:42

Shout 'yay!!!I won a tenner!!!!' then explain that before his visit you had bet your DH that he would say exactly 'whateer annoying thing he said' because he is soooooooooo predictable and then get DH to pass you a tenner ruefully

Do it three or four times and he will get the messge. grin

duomonstermum Tue 22-Jul-08 10:36:09

my BIL used to this and it reallypissed me off. he pushed too far one day at a familiy bbq and i ended up saying (in a really loud voice) "i'm so sorry that DH is uber fertile.i guess you must be firing blanks. i've heard that being such good friends with palmela and her 5 friends tends to do that..." evil i know but he has left me alone since. that and his mum telling him to stop behaving like such a twonk and generally treating him like he's 10 did the trick lol grin

MimisMama Tue 22-Jul-08 10:40:01

I like DDFred's bet suggestion!

Or, just say to him 'I'm REALLY interested in why you keep asking this?!' in an amused/perplexed way...

moondog Tue 22-Jul-08 10:45:57

Smile mysteriously an dsat 'Well you konwwhat they say about men who constantly ask questions like that don't you/'##

Refuse to elaborate. Freaksem out.

moondog Tue 22-Jul-08 10:46:00

Smile mysteriously an dsat 'Well you konwwhat they say about men who constantly ask questions like that don't you/'##

Refuse to elaborate. Freaksem out.

moondog Tue 22-Jul-08 10:46:02

Smile mysteriously an dsat 'Well you konwwhat they say about men who constantly ask questions like that don't you/'##

Refuse to elaborate. Freaksem out.

HermanMunster Tue 22-Jul-08 10:47:54

just out of interest why do such questions annoy you?
i'm not saying that he's not being an arse, i just don't see the offensive/annoying part of it that it's to do with your kids or is it just the fact that it's the same question all of the time?

jelliebelly Tue 22-Jul-08 10:54:49

Just ignore him. He's being immature and is obviously lacking in conversational skills - its probably the only thing he can think to say tbh. He's probably jealous - presume he doesn't have kids of his own..

2point4kids Tue 22-Jul-08 13:27:38

Thanks, some good ideas there!

If PILs are not around next time he says it I will go with Ruby's idea and I love the tenner bet idea too! Will have to rope DH in to that one grin

Herman, do you know I am thinking hard and I really cant explain properly why it annoys me so much. I think its because its the same question over and over that makes it seem so childish and almost snidey.
If it was other BIL that asked me then I would answer him honestly and say 'i'm not 100% sure, but am mostly sure that we'll stick at 2' and he'd answer sensibly and that would be that.
With this BIL though he just turns any answer into a joke/something negative and then asks the same thing next time! I think he is actually trying to deflect any child type attention away from him as SIL wants babies and he's not so keen!

He is pretty immature all round really. I hate hate hate when he is sarky or 'joking' with my DS who is 2 because DS just doesnt get that BIL is being sarky as he is too young and it just seems so mean to me.

I do say firmly 'stop that please' when he is being a twat with the DCs but dont want to say anything harsher as SIL is so lovely and would be really upset that I think her DH is being such a twat.
The one time he did something that made me want to rip into him big time, we were at DH Granny's funeral so I had to bite my tongue angry

jesuswhatnext Tue 22-Jul-08 14:55:39

i would ask him if his brother was aware of his fixation about your sex life?

pervy git!

quinne Tue 05-Aug-08 23:10:28

Maybe BIL and SIL are having problems conceiving, so people getting pregnant is on his mind more than it would normally be and he's absent-mindedly asking you when he's really thinking about his own wife?

Maybe it winds him up that his brother clearly has no problems getting his wife pregnant?

Or maybe he just lacks any social graces and thinks this is a good way of making conversation?

Anniegetyourgun Tue 05-Aug-08 23:17:16

Saying "we thought it was your turn next" might miff him then. [evil emoticon]

solidgoldbrass Tue 05-Aug-08 23:17:20

If he is being pressured by his DW about having babies (or if they are trying and not having any luck) then his constant comments might be a reflection of his stress rather than an attack on you.

Or he might be a berk who is only doing it because it gets a rise out of you.

You could try shouting "OH LOOK! A PIXIE!" every time he does it.

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