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Horrible argument with dh - feeling terrible

(19 Posts)
mymittens Sun 13-Jul-08 14:26:40

Ilm having a breast reduction and and last night i wanted dh to take a phot of them so i could see the transformation, eventually. I feel very uncomfotable with him seeing them ans wanted it over with quickly. I could see the camera was a tthe wrong anle so asked him to move it. He'd already taken the photo and told him again it was at the wrong angle. he wanted to see the pic firts and then i just lost it, i got so upset about him not just doing the picture how i wanted it and not letting it get done quickly. I rushed off and got dressed again. We'd both had a lot to drink hich may have made out reations more over the top. He is always less tolerant after alot of wine. Still on bad terms now - he';s taken ds out and i've been in bed all day

mymittens Sun 13-Jul-08 14:32:27

They've just got back and i don't know what to do . dh just cam i and kissed my head - i blanked him. he's reading to ds now. What really upsets me is that he doesnt think he was at all insensitive yesterday and doesn't sthink he did anything wrong. he ended up saying he woudn't even look after me after the op. has since since said he will. I'm dreading the recovery with him looking after me more than the op. There's not one else who can help either

sleepycat Sun 13-Jul-08 14:43:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lulumama Sun 13-Jul-08 14:45:32

you are being a bit over sensitive. go and make up with him ,he was trying to help you, not his fault that he did not get the angle right first time.

if wine makes you both so bad tempered then you need to cut down

you are making things very hard for him if he tries to make amends and you blank him and criticise for thiongs he has not even done yte

hanaflowerisnothana Sun 13-Jul-08 14:46:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Desiderata Sun 13-Jul-08 14:47:50

Get thyself out of bed, mittens, and make like nothing happened.

The poor man's done his best. It's over to you now.

IAteRosemaryConleyForBreakfast Sun 13-Jul-08 14:48:37

Lulu speaks wisdom.

mymittens Sun 13-Jul-08 14:56:58

Just went downstairs with the intention of making up and then i saw he'd left his dirty shoes on our new rug. So ended up having a moan about htat instead. He just ignored me and carried on reading the paper so i've come back upstairs

themildmanneredjanitor Sun 13-Jul-08 14:59:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IAteRosemaryConleyForBreakfast Sun 13-Jul-08 14:59:35

Sorry mittens but dirty shoes? The phrase "give and take" springs to mind here.

ie, you need to.

themildmanneredjanitor Sun 13-Jul-08 14:59:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mymittens Sun 13-Jul-08 15:01:14

I know, it just seems like one thing after another. I'm very grateful he got up with ds this morning and took him out out so i could rest in bed. I'll got back down and see ehat happens

TillyScoutsmum Sun 13-Jul-08 15:01:27

Do you always have "horrible arguments" about petty things ? Give him a break

themildmanneredjanitor Sun 13-Jul-08 15:02:31

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lulumama Sun 13-Jul-08 15:03:35

i don;t blame him for ignoring you

there is alot of mileage in a sincere apology, and you owe him one

you might be being over sensitive and anxious but if you are going to perpetually punish your DH over minor things, that are really not worht it, you will be constantly in this negative cycle

ever heard the phrase, 'don;t sweat the small stuff?\

pick your battles

VictorianSqualor Sun 13-Jul-08 15:10:53

People argue, it's part of living together.

An argument IMO should end when it finishes, not carry on the next day. Stop being moody and go sort it out with him.

HonoriaGlossop Sun 13-Jul-08 16:19:07

yes YABU! He was only trying to help in the first place. And the shoes were on the rug BECAUSE he had taken out your child for a play!

ok it would be very nice if he could have put his shoes away; but what's more important?

Agree you need to apologise to him!

mymittens Sun 13-Jul-08 16:22:49

I went to make up with him a while ago. I know i overreacted. Thanks for all you help. x

HonoriaGlossop Sun 13-Jul-08 16:32:23

well done you smile

good luck with the op!

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