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he suddenly cant do it no more

(19 Posts)
hayley88 Thu 10-Jul-08 20:23:23

Hi, well basically me and dp have been together nearly 3years. Weve got a beautiful son together who is now 14months old.

We have had our downs recently but i thought it was things we could and can pull threw.

He woke up this mornin went work without sayin bye or giving me a kiss. I later recieved a text sayin that he cannot do it any longer and we are over.

This is so out the blue and unexpected. I am soupset and truely heartbroken

Anglepoise Thu 10-Jul-08 22:57:34

Don't know what to say but bumping for you

Litterbug Thu 10-Jul-08 23:01:47

Cosette Thu 10-Jul-08 23:11:23

So sorry to hear this, it must have been an awful shock sad. Has he come home this evening, and said anything more?

youcannotbeserious Thu 10-Jul-08 23:22:24

Has he come home?

How are you feeling?

does he have any plans on how things are going to work? Does he plan to support you?

Hope you are OK.

Flibbertyjibbet Thu 10-Jul-08 23:29:59

BY TEXT? shockshock

I am so sorry that you are in this situation. I just can't get over the fact that he told you by text. I'm finding it very hard not to call him some names but thats not going to help you.

Has he talked to you at all since the text of whats going to happen? Has he mentioned financial support for you or dd? Do you live together, do you work? Etc etc. Sorry to be practical but you need to see a solicitor and get on to the tax credits people with your change in situation.

On the other hand, he may feel differently after a few days away and come back wanting to make a go of things.

HonoriaGlossop Thu 10-Jul-08 23:31:32

A text? When you have a child together?

Good god.

I could accept this for a 12 year old's relationship but for an adult with a child? I'm staggered.

You poor thing. How are you? Has he communicated more at all?

Swedes Thu 10-Jul-08 23:35:40

I'm very sorry. What were the recent downs?

<I read the original thread title as someone with erectile dysfunction blush>

hayley88 Thu 10-Jul-08 23:44:51

He's moved back to his mums. He said that he will always care for me and our son.

He said the arguin has got to much and he doesnt want to be in this situation no more. He also said that there wont be an "us" anymore and hes not sure if he loves me anymore.

sunshinenshowers Thu 10-Jul-08 23:57:50

How old is he?

You say he has moved back to his mum's ,he should talk this through with you instead of running back to his mum.

Swedes Thu 10-Jul-08 23:58:46

Hayley - Horrible for you. Try to get a good night's sleep if you can. It's impossible trying to think straight when you are upset and tired.

youcannotbeserious Fri 11-Jul-08 00:02:28

Yes, he should talk it through with you - but in the absence of his maturity - can you talk to him mum?

hayley88 Fri 11-Jul-08 00:09:52

yes iv spoke to her she said dont worry he wont mean it and you's will be back together.

I just got of the phone to him and hes told me he hasn't been happy for 8months he doesn't think he loves me and hes sorry for hurting me.

I dont understand why he would say 3 days ago that he loves me wants to marry me and tell me he's be lost without me. then tun around and do this to me.

i cant sleep iv got a banging headache and im far too stressed to sleep.

hayley88 Fri 11-Jul-08 00:10:46


hayley88 Fri 11-Jul-08 00:13:30

its my birthday in 12days aswell now ill be spending it alone

youcannotbeserious Fri 11-Jul-08 22:09:48

Hi hope you are OK.

PLease remember that (i) you won't be alone as you have your DC and (ii) it's better to be alone for the right reasons than to be in a relationship for the wrong ones.

If this 'man' continues to treat you like this, then you deserve to shut the door on him, and move on positively with your life.

Hope you are OK.

charlotte121 Fri 11-Jul-08 23:31:06

is there no chance you could get some counciling and talk things through.... perhaps if you both sat down and discussed all the problems you are experiancing with the relationship you would be able to work through them.

Monkeytrousers Fri 11-Jul-08 23:34:58

not over till the fat lady sings. give him some time to think things over. Sounds like he needs some space is all. You will be okay smile

Monkeytrousers Fri 11-Jul-08 23:37:31

Birthdays come and go - they don't mean anything. Your kids do, you do.

12 days is a long time away really. Get through day to day - no expectations - just love your kids and learn to like yourself and the rest will come

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