My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Weekend Rows

6 replies

Nutjob · 12/01/2003 17:54

Dh and me seem to be rowing all the time lately. It's worse at the weekends, I think it's because I have my own routine during the week with the kids and then all of a sudden he is around all the time and we just seem to clash. By Sunday afternoon/evening everything has calmed down, then he's off to work and it starts all over again next week.

It was even worse over the Christmas holidays. He had 2 weeks off, and at first I thought one of us would end up walking out we were at each others throats so much, but by the end of it we were all having such a good time I was sad when he went back to work and ds went back to school.

The worst of it was, we had a blazing row infront of the kids yesterday, something I vowed I would never do, and I felt just awful afterwards.

I don't really why I am telling you all this, I suppose I just wanted to get it off my chest, and to know if I am the only one who's going through this?

OP posts:
Report
EmmaTMG · 12/01/2003 18:11

Although we don't row as such, I often feel the same. Dh works shifts of 7 days lates then 7 days earlies so any routine we have is generally messed up when he's around.
I know that it's mostly me picking holes in everything he does but he's good enough not to 'take the bait' so it rarely gets to a argument.
I found that my PMS made everyones life a misery in our house so took evening primose oil for awhile and the difference was amazing. Everything that bugged me before simply didn't and we had a very harmonious (spelt wrong, I think) house hold. I keep forgetting to buy some more so I or we are all back to square one.
Not entirely sure if this helps but I think we are pretty much talking about the same thing.

Report
genia · 12/01/2003 19:12

I think it's because at the weekend you have to get used to a different rhythm and of doing things together and so the "getting used to it again" period of time is fraught. The same thing happened to us when I was working (dh has always kind of worked from home) - now we are both home a lot and still arguing! (see my previous thread)... Seriously though, I think it's completely normal and due to the adjustment period of being together again - it's ashame weekends aren't longer.

Report
breeze · 15/01/2003 14:07

nutjob, I know exactly how you feel, i look forward to speading time with my dh, but as soon as he gets a day off it all goes wrong and we start rowing. I do think it has to do with routine and when he has a week off we spend the first couple of days rowing then by the time he goes back i really miss him.

I am glad that you posted because it does make you feel better that you are not the only ones.

I hope it gets better, again as mentioned it got a lot worse with pmt, but unfortunately i have a dh who does take the bait and we seem to row a lot, but we are both fiery people.

Report
Linzoid · 15/01/2003 22:07

Glad to hear i'mm not the only one. Sometimes i think noone could possibly argue and make up as often as we do. Weekends are definately the worst. I hate him being away at work but then we can't aggree on anything when he's home! He always gets too serious it can never just be a difference of opinion he has to go too deep and suggest splitting up ( Don't no why because we never have done in 10 years). Just b4 Christmas we actually had a blazing barney about where the christmas tree was going and it got so bad that dh threw it out into the street!! Needless to say the neighbours got a bit of entertainment.

Report
AngieL · 15/01/2003 22:14

I'm usually glad when Monday comes around again as well. The kids constantly fight each other for dh attention when he is at home, he ends up getting fed up because he can't even turn around and they all jump on him.

I then get fed up with him as I don't think he should get fed up with them and so it goes on. We don't really row though, I just end up feeling like I've got 4 kids instead of 3.

Report
Bugsy · 16/01/2003 09:57

Weekends seem stressful in our house too. We had a chat about it over Christmas and decided that on Thursday nights we would both try and decide what we wanted to do over the weekend, so that we weren't aiming for wildly different agendas. Plus we try and build in a bit of time for each of us to have a break (maybe just one hour) from the children. It has really helped us the last two weekends.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.