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Does anyone have advice on a bad marriage breakdown???

(12 Posts)
pinkdiamond Wed 12-Jan-05 19:10:03

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pinkdiamond Wed 12-Jan-05 19:11:15

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pinkdiamond Wed 12-Jan-05 19:33:01

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glitterfairy Wed 12-Jan-05 19:35:18

THis sounds really awful. I am sorry that I have no advice apart from doing what you are doing now which seems to be being a good freidn.

pinkdiamond Wed 12-Jan-05 19:41:17

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aloha Wed 12-Jan-05 19:48:43

The solicitor will help her with her rights and explain re the injunction. In addition she can call her local police station and ask to speak to the domestic violence unit who will also support her. However, if she is really frightened then I think she should trust her instincts and go somewhere safe while all this is happening. Does she have somewhere to go with her children? Her safety really is the important thing - injunctions can be breached. If she doesn't have friends or family she can go to then a women's refuge would be better than putting herself in danger. She is a brave woman and I wish her all the luck in the world.

weightwatchingwaterwitch Wed 12-Jan-05 20:47:54

Pinkdiamond, can you print off some stuff from the Women's Aid site for her?

pinkdiamond Wed 12-Jan-05 20:54:13

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pinkdiamond Wed 12-Jan-05 22:18:23

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aloha Wed 12-Jan-05 22:43:12

It's a good idea to write to the school, and also to discuss this with her solicitor. She can take steps legally to prevent her husband taking the children out of school and from taking them abroad if this worries her. An injunction and a prohibited steps order may be useful. She should make a list of every single worry and question she has and make sure she doesn't leave her solicitor until she feels she has had a satisfactory answer to them all. Also, I would recommend talking to the domestic violence unit at her local police station. I think she will find that very useful and, I hope, comforting. But most of all, she should put her own and her children's safety first, and if that means leaving then she should do it.

jojo38 Thu 13-Jan-05 23:20:19

I am so sorry for your friends dilemma. I do hope things start calming soon.

I noticed your question about school. If she can speak or write to the head with her request, they have to make every effort to comply.

Again, a solicitor will be able to give her all the info she needs. CAB are good too. The car is in her name but is it financed and if so, who's name is the agreement in.
This agreement is legally binding. If they are joint signatures on it, then she can state that she felt it best to as it was her husbands request. She may not have realised what she was entering into.
If car paid for - in her name, her car. It depends on where he sells it - who to, how 'blind' they need to be. The log book doesn't prove much but at least a reputable place may query it. (Should)

The food situ - eek... bullying. Not a nice place to be. Many womens sites, I think one mentioned before is a good one. Has your friend any family she could stay with - is there any possibility she and children could stay with you for a bit? The housing people (if UK) will help her - albeit eventually - you may have to 'evict' her tho... get her to ask at CAB or solicitor.
There are shelters but I am not very clued up on that area.

Her real best bet is to stay put... hard, I know.
If she leaves the marital home then she loses any claim to it. Try and get her to stay and him to leave. She needs a roof over her and the childrens heads.

How very very sad for all concerned. I send love and hope for a brighter future for all. {{{{hugs}}}}

mummytojames Fri 14-Jan-05 00:31:22

sorry cant be much help but did find this web site which should give her all the information needed hope this helps here

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