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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Have asked h to come home

30 replies

sykes · 21/12/2004 01:02

Sorry, am sure it's too late, but have just told h he can come home after splitting two years ago - he ahd an affair. left gf in May and told him he had to be on his own for six monts - loads of counselling. that's it.

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MarsselectionboxLady · 21/12/2004 01:04

Been there, brave move. Hope it works out

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Tania2 · 21/12/2004 02:13

Sykes so to ask a personal question but will you ever trust him again? Your very brave.

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twinkletwinklelittlespook · 21/12/2004 06:28

SYKES!!!!! Am off to the smoke this morning.Thanks goodness I caught this before I left. Honey-I am so so happy for you. I know that this was a HUGE step for you and to ask him home you are 100% sure of him.
What a wonderful Christmas present for all of you.
Take care Sykes family and a Very Merry Christmas.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

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emMerryChristmastmg · 21/12/2004 07:24

I remeber your thread 6 months ago when he split from GF(and the affair threads). You've really done well Sykes and I truelly truelly hope that everything works out well for you.

I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and 2005 brings you all lots of happiness.

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WideWebWitch · 21/12/2004 07:50

I remember him leaving too sykes. I hope it works out.

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DoesntChristmasDragOn · 21/12/2004 08:13

Good luck, Sykes.

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winnie1 · 21/12/2004 09:42

Best wishes Sykes xx

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anorak · 21/12/2004 09:44

With all my heart I wish you the utmost success, Sykes. People do come through this, especially when they have followed all the counselling steps, as you so sensibly have. Lots of love xxx

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midnightmass · 21/12/2004 09:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 21/12/2004 09:47

Well you must have thought it through very hard before you asked... and you must want him home .. and the counselling must have helped .. so all I can say is Congratulations .. I hope you have a future full of happinness

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SantaFio2 · 21/12/2004 09:47

sykes I wish you all the luck in the world and keep my fingers tighty crossed that your h will never ever hurt you again. you have come so far though my dear. i remember when he left and how it destroyed you. You are so brave and such a lovely lady xx

ps thanks for making FF a happy lady this weekend too x

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Kaysleighbells · 21/12/2004 09:52

Sykes, I hope this all works out for you. You have done everything right and you were true to your word. You have been so strong, well done.
Have a very happy Christmas. X

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Papillon · 21/12/2004 09:56

All the best to you sykes

Take care and merry xmas. Glad to hear ff will be with you x

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Piffleoffagus · 21/12/2004 10:00

Agree with everyone else you have been bloody incredible dealing with this
I hope it brings you happiness as by God you deserve it..
xx

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galaxy · 21/12/2004 10:03

Hi Sykes, hope this works out for you all. Think you've been very brave and strong.

Happy Christmas to you all

xx

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MoHoHo2 · 21/12/2004 10:07

Sykes - just saw this - well done for being so strong throughout all of this.
You're a kind person to give him another chance - I hope it all works out. Have a good Christmas with your DDs!
Mo2
xxx

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Blu · 21/12/2004 10:52

Sykes - i was wondering what was happening. What do you mean 'you're sure it's too late' - or was that because you were posting at 1am?
You have been so strong and handled this exactly the right way, making him wait, counselling. How is he? Jubilant?
My parents separated under the same circumstances and are now back together. The only difference is that Mum puts her foot down earlier and more often, and expects more of him.

All love for a happy christmas and life anew in 2005.

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sykes · 21/12/2004 11:29

Thank you for all your messages - v kind. Sorry - meant it was too late last night when I posted to expect a response. Who knows what the future holds but am feeling positive etc. We're still carrying on with the counselling for at least another six months as am sure we'll need it. He's not moved back in yet but it will be soon - I debated about asking him to stay away for another three months but think the time is now right. I hope we've both learnt a lot over the last two years. Thanks again.

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zubb · 21/12/2004 11:36

Oh Sykes, well done, hope it all goes really well.

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NameChangingMancMidlander · 21/12/2004 11:39

Hi Sykes

I remember reading the thread you started re x leaving his gf and the rules you'd laid down when he wanted to come back. Well done you for sticking to your guns on the '6 months & counselling' thing, I can imagine how easy it might have been to just attempt to bury the past without dealing with it and running into his arms.

I only hope that he can prove to you his love and can show you and his children that he is worthy of being trusted and loved by you all again.

I so hope this works out for you all, sykes. Very, very, very best of luck and have a lovely Christmas

xxx

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sobernoel · 21/12/2004 11:40

Sykes - just read this. I hope it works out for you, you deserve to be happy and you have held your family together wonderfully throughout this. Your girls will be so proud of you as they grow up and realise what you have done.

I also hope your h realises what a woman he has in you!

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JanH · 21/12/2004 11:41

Good luck, sykes .

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sykes · 21/12/2004 11:45

He says it's the best christmas present he could ever wish for. So I've told him I presume I don't need to bother going shopping then. I am not taking this lightly and am incredibly worried about upsetting the girls if it all goes wrong again, and me - which is why I made him live on his own for, what it now, seven months. However, despite his appalling behaviour that is just not excusable, I wasn't exactly a saint myself in some ways and I've needed to grow up and exmine various things about our relationship.Thanks again, very much and hope everyone has a great christmas.

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Hulababy · 21/12/2004 11:47

Good luck Sykes.

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StuffTheMagicTurkey · 21/12/2004 11:49

Lots of luck sykes xxx.

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