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What one weird thing has killed a relationship stone dead in an instant for you?

(551 Posts)
talkingmongoose Sat 08-Mar-08 22:11:12

Just something that told you there was nooooo future?

I was seeing a chap quite some years ago, pre DH. We had been dating about a year, and were getting into bed at his place when I mentioned that I had my period, just in a casual 'so no rumpy-pumpy tonight' kind of way. The issue had never come up before.

He went all pale with disgust, said 'I wish you hadn't told me that', and proceeded to sleep on the floor.

Utter, utter twunt, I never returned his calls after that. Lucky escape.

S1ur Sun 09-Mar-08 00:21:30

bad sex.

Dead as a dodo.

ladette Sun 09-Mar-08 00:22:57

The chat up line "I'm feeling horny, how about it" (when up til that point, he was on a promise....)

Oh my god you've just reminded me of another one! (with the weird sex moves thing)

I was seeing a deaf guy for a couple of weeks, he seemed really sweet at first but got weird really quickly. Anyway it was the first and last time we were in bed together. He was delving in his rucksack beside the bed and told me to close my eyes. I heard a huge whirring noise and felt him attempting to ram something down the front of my pants (!) so leapt up to find he'd attempted to get me off using his shakeawake vibrating alarm clock thingy, which was set to fucking road drill. hmm I wasn't impressed! Even less impressed when I realised it had to be one of his trademark moves, for him to carry it around with him (yuck!)

That was also the day he told me that even though he was going out with me, he didn't consider himself a "chubby chaser" LOL - charming.

Serious, mahoosive loser. After we broke up he sent long long letters to me with cartoony doodles of himself as a pirate, and naked with a traffic cone over his privates. I could go on, he was a real piece of work.

MrsMacaroon Sun 09-Mar-08 00:33:44

To clarify- not with a whisk but with two fingers in whisking motion...the dolphin noises were at climactic moment (not mine I hasten to add). Just got a chill thinking about it.

skyatnight Sun 09-Mar-08 00:38:03

I once really liked a bloke but he had huge fingernails - the size of ten pence pieces.

I can remember a long day sightseeing with another bloke around a capital city. He had an upset stomach but was really making an effort to carry on with the day for my sake. I should have ben grateful but he kept trying to kiss me inbetween frequent trips to the loo and to chemists and it really put me off. I can remember the relief I felt when I got onto the train to go home, thinking I won't see him again.

(God, I could be here all night relating details about weird dates. I'd love to hear a men's version of this.)

Mumcentreplus Sun 09-Mar-08 00:40:09

lol@Sky...Spade fingers..((shudder))

BoysOnToast Sun 09-Mar-08 00:43:25

oh yeah!
id forgotten the guy who...
im at his house, watching telly. we are a pretty new couple. i get up to go to the loo, muttering that i am going to the loo, as you do.
he says "can i come?"
"i want to come and watch... would that be ok?"


VeniVidiVickiQV Sun 09-Mar-08 00:45:24

LOL at "whisk manoevre" grin

Mine..... "I want to be called "Axl" from now on". I was only 13 and it was all a bit toooo weird for me!

talkingmongoose Sun 09-Mar-08 00:47:07

And a chap who used the immortal line...

'can I wank on your tits'.

Wow, that made me feel really, just, so, so special.

Mumcentreplus Sun 09-Mar-08 00:47:19

Oh Gosh!@BOT...freeky!grin

BoysOnToast Sun 09-Mar-08 00:51:30

oh yes. v freaky.
he explained at length how he had acquired this taste for watching ladies 'go'. and yes, he wanted to watch both.. was just warming me up asking to watch me pee, apparently. where would it all have ended i (do not) wonder?

im as open minded as, well, every 100th person maybe, but waste products are just Not My Bag baby

Scramble Sun 09-Mar-08 00:56:49

LOL dolphins and pirates with traffic cones, why do we even bother with men grin.

madamez Sun 09-Mar-08 01:04:08

Hmm, there was a guy who, during the first shag, suddenly let rip with this extended-bass-solo of farts. Not smelly (thank f*ck for that) but so LOUD! I just could not ever do anything with him again...

ALMummy Sun 09-Mar-08 08:59:27

The one who squared up to his "ex" girlfriend when she walked into a pub and caught us on a date together. I didnt know he was actually still with her so tried to leave whereupon he told me he loved me - this was our first date.

lottymadbird Sun 09-Mar-08 09:06:00

on first sight of his er... manhood. That was it. definitely no future.

wider than it was long and veered seriously off to the left hand side half way up. eeeeyuk.

holsobsessed Sun 09-Mar-08 09:41:40

The line
'I am going to xxxx you until you bleed.'

Strangely didn't give him the chance to find out.

Stone, stone dead

FloraPosteschild Sun 09-Mar-08 09:44:53

Mumcentreplus...OCD isn't really that funny. I hope he gets some help.

callmeovercautious Sun 09-Mar-08 09:49:03

Waking up to find him stood in front of a Mirror wearing a dress of mine at 3am shock

policywonk Sun 09-Mar-08 09:52:19

hols - shock!

MrsSnape Sun 09-Mar-08 10:00:32

I was once going out with a lad I met at air cadets. He was from a posh family, private school etc...

Anyway we were going to the cinema one night and went to catch a bus, we stood there as the bus approached and he didn't do anything and I was faffing around trying to get something out of my handbag so I said "put your hand out then...." so he replied "No Way! I hate public transport! so embarrassing!" shock That was the end of that one.

marmadukescarlet Sun 09-Mar-08 11:56:49

fpc, am a little confused. Which of the strange sexual encounters do you think is caused by OCD?

Unfitmother Sun 09-Mar-08 12:01:12

Broke off an engagement after he said he wouldn't give up smoking when we had dcs.
Just saw him differently after that.

FloraPosteschild Sun 09-Mar-08 13:43:45

By Mumcentreplus on Sat 08-Mar-08 22:21:25
...No way!..funnily enough a friend of mine has just found out her BF is a freak...she thinks he has

I was just responding to this comment, Marmaduke smile

colditz Sun 09-Mar-08 13:52:45

Watching my boyfriend's mum get up out of bed to cook his dinner (from scratch) when he came in at 10pm, and proceed to lay the little table in front of him - knife, fork, salt, pepper, fresh gravy .... and i will never forget the sight of a tiny 60 year old woman on her knees, picking up the peas and sweetcorn her 22 year old son had dropped on her carpet from between his two feet.

I was gobsmacked.

Disenchanted Sun 09-Mar-08 13:54:03


colditz thats disgusting angry

My grans son who is 44 still treats her like that! Shes 65!

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